Gutfeld: On the brink of a world war, Dems' priority is climate

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Gutfeld: Russia's green scam

'Gutfeld!' panelists discuss how the Left's climate agenda is affecting Americans by depending on foreign energy.

So as we're on the brink of world war, what are the media geniuses obsessing over? 

Well, did you see "The Atlantic" magazine's take on Ukraine? The headline: "On Top of Everything Else, Nuclear War Would Be a Climate Problem." 

Yes, that's the priority. A country gets vaporized, but it's also 1 degree warmer for the shell-shocked survivors, and God help them. 

If you're a radioactive zombie, you might forget to sort your recycling on trash day. Or worse, the fall-out would cover the Coexist sticker on your Prius. 

Try applying that logic elsewhere. Sure, you might get terminal cancer, but imagine what that does to your tennis elbow. 

But if only it was the media that was this myopic. The House Dems want Biden to declare a national climate emergency. And why not? 

President Biden. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster) ((AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster))

Climate emergency is the Left's second-favorite freakout when blaming everything on racism wants to take the night off. 

The goal: to ban oil drilling on federal lands. It's more proof the Left are in lockstep with what Putin wants: for us to be dependent on other countries like his for energy. 

Personally, I think all this green talk is Russian propaganda. That's right, lefties. It's you who are Putin puppets. Not me. 

Speaking of, Putin actually claims he now wants reparations for Alaska. And I say, why not? How about 40 acres and Joy Behar. 

Russian President Vladimir Putin. (Mikhail Metzel, Sputnik, Kremlin Pool Photo via AP) ((Mikhail Metzel, Sputnik, Kremlin Pool Photo via AP)

Now, the Dems are also calling to end fossil fuel subsidies. I'm for that. If by fossil fuels, they mean the five bottles of Ensure that Joe drinks a day. 

Of course, how does that help the average American? It doesn't, and that's the point. It's part of the ideology of punishment, which is not just the name of my favorite club downtown. I have my own whip locker.

But it's also how the Left views policy. They don't mind high gas prices. They want them to punish us for being greedy capitalists.

If I sound like AOC right now, that's the point too. Our energy policies are being shaped by someone who should be making banana daiquiris at Applebee's. 

This also is why they deny the crime wave and let violent thugs off scot-free to punish us for 400 years of oppression. Apparently, elderly Asian women must have owned slaves too. 

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. (Photo by Caroline Brehman/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images) (Photo by Caroline Brehman/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images)

They also lauded riots as protest. That's punishment for your uncaring economic system. Let us have free stuff or die. 

And of course, you should wear masks indefinitely, they say. Because you deserve it. Not about safety. It's about punishment. 

Otherwise, they'd wear masks too at their award shows and gala events. But really, it's because they can't stand to see a smile, hear you speak, or know that you're breathing freely without their permission. 

It's the new ideology: morphing politics into morality, becoming a new religion in which there's no forgiveness — only confession — followed by penance. 

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I just filled my Ford F-150 with unleaded. 

OK, son, your penance: say five Hail Gretas and retrofit your house with solar panels. 

And since everything the Left wants is based on punishing you, it's OK if it helps our adversaries. 

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Let's take Russia, who duped Europe into depending on their energy, by funding rabid environmental groups. As we start to shun Russian oil, we're now finding out that they actually funded green groups that crapped on non-Russian fuels. 

They were using disinformation within green groups to steer countries away from fracking and shale gas in favor of their imported Russian gas. 

It's the equivalent of shutting down rehab clinics to addicts who would go back to their old ways. It all makes so much sense now, doesn't it? 

Of course, you need to be a sucker to get sucked. We had leaders who took — that came out in a weird way — but we had leaders who took environmental advice from a brat like Greta Thunberg and a president who dreamed of sniffing her hair. 

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That's because the ideology of punishment means punishing our industry while bolstering theirs because we are the oppressor. 

So now it did see president blames Putin for rising prices when it was him and his stupid party all along. 

Fact is, it takes months to affect oil and gas prices. What we're seeing now is the direct result of Joe Biden's anti-industry policies from the moment he first soiled the Oval Office carpet. 

Sadly, Russia and China knew what an easy mark our virtue-signaling White House was. 

They were happily playing chess while our bozos got lost in the ice cream slopes of Candy Land. 

This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld's opening commentary on the March 16, 2022, edition of "Gutfeld!"