Ashley Madison honcho says ‘monogamy doesnt work’ for everyone
Ashley Madison chief strategy officer Paul Keable insists people would be cheating whether the controversial dating site existed.
Valentine’s Day presents a conundrum for many members of the controversial online dating service Ashley Madison, which caters to married people and uses the slogan "Life is short. Have an affair."
"We have recent data that says 57% of our members say that Valentine's Day does not reflect how they view modern relationships have evolved," Ashley Madison chief strategy officer Paul Keable told Fox News Digital.
"It’s not indicative of where modern dating is moving towards," he said. "And I think that's where the struggle is."
![Ashley Madison](https://a57.foxnews.com/static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2023/11/1200/675/AM-1.jpg?ve=1&tl=1)
Valentine’s Day is quite interesting for many members of controversial online dating service Ashley Madison, which caters to married people and uses the slogan "Life is short. Have an affair." (Ashley Madison)
Keable said Valentine's Day is historically seen as a place to put all your time, effort, and money into a singular individual with gestures such as flowers, romantic dinner, and other gifts. But he feels "non-monogamy is increasing in interest and popularity," leading to questions about the annual holiday.
He said Ashley Madison users ponder whether to have multiple dates on Valentine’s Day, or even spread it over multiple days. While some are worried about spreading their love, 31% of Ashley Madison members indicated they don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day at all. According to the survey, 58% of members feel Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a "money grab."
"I think the majority of Americans would believe and say that Valentine's Day has primarily become a marketing event designed to guilt you into purchasing items for your partner," Keable said.
![couple valentines day](https://a57.foxnews.com/static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2023/02/1200/675/Valentines-flowers.jpg?ve=1&tl=1)
Of the Ashley Madison members who do celebrate Valentine’s Day, 56% of them said they only celebrate because they have to. (iStock)
Keable also believes that Americans who only celebrate their partner on Valentine’s Day should be concerned that Ashley Madison could have a new customer in the near future.
"If you center your whole relationship on one singular day to show your value, if this is the one day you shop for flowers and gifts, and you're absent the other 364 days of the year, trust me when I tell you this," he said. "Your partner’s more than likely to end up on Ashley Madison because you're not fulfilling your needs with that primary relationship."
But Ashley Madison users aren’t just people who are unhappy with their partner, as many believe they are entitled to multiple partners.
"The belief that traditional monogamy doesn't work for everyone. And it's not a rejection of monogamy en masse, because that's still going to work for a significant portion of the population," Keable said.
"But a lot of our members are saying, ‘Listen, I love my partner. Everything is working out fantastically, except there's certain elements, particularly on intimate needs that aren't being met, and if I went to a non-monogamous style relationship that's open, polyamory, all other sorts of different varieties of that, I can have my cake and eat it, too,’" he continued. "We actually just did a recent study on our Gen Z population and a significant portion, about 40% of them, are saying, ‘Yeah, polyamory, open relationships, non-monogamy. That's the future for us.'"
Of the Ashley Madison members who do celebrate Valentine’s Day, 56% of them said they only celebrate because they are obligated. Romantic dinners were listed as the way 36% of them celebrate, while gifts or flowers are exchanged by 34% and 31% celebrate with sex. Other celebrations such as a vacation or spa date were also cited as ways the adulterers celebrate Valentine’s Day.
![happy couple](https://a57.foxnews.com/static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2022/02/1200/675/Woman-Man-Beach.jpg?ve=1&tl=1)
Ashley Madison users ponder whether to have multiple dates on Valentine’s Day, or even spread them over multiple days. (iStock)
Keable, who insists that people would be cheating whether or not the scandalous dating site existed, said that previous surveys indicated many Ashley Madison members celebrate Valentine’s Day on a date other than February 14.
"We often have talked about Mistress Day, which is a bit of a misnomer because that doesn't take into account our female members, with their paramours. But the idea was on February 13 is the day you meet with your secondary partner and Valentine's Day is kept for your primary partner," he said.
"Most people in in non-monogamous groups, or as it pertains to Ashley Madison adulterous relationships, are going to completely understand the reasons for having a romantic evening outside of Valentine's Day," Keable added. "Because if I went to my primary partner said, ‘Oh, I'm not going to be around on the 14th, I have a dinner with somebody else,’ I think I'd raise a lot of suspicion."