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Meghan King Edmonds is finding ways to pick up the pieces of her life in the midst of her divorce from estranged husband Jim Edmonds and is admitting that the process in conjunction with other life developments has been difficult to handle at times.
“Trauma affects all of us at some point in time but for others, it all seems to bear down at once,” Meghan, 35, wrote in a blog post on her website on Monday.
Titled “Release,” the address explains how Meghan has learned to deal with “emotional releases,” and the former “Real Housewives of Orange County” star opens up about how she manages to get through her days by writing about her pain.
“Let me tell you something, some days I’m barely hanging on by a thread,” she said. “Some moments I can’t breathe. Sometimes I get in bed and the bed is vibrating, but it’s not: I’m just shaking.”
She maintained that she loathes moments where she is subjected to “trauma.”
“I don’t like having moments of loss, panic, and utter despair, so I’ve tried not to feel them at all,” she said. “All intense feelings are time-consuming: we relish in the good ones, like falling in love or earning a promotion, but we hide from the ones that hurt. And I don’t mean ‘hurt’ like the anger you feel when you get a parking ticket or the sadness you feel from your favorite dress being too tight.”
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“I mean, mind-numbing despair,” she continued.
The mother of three and entrepreneur said she understands the rash reaction of fleeing difficult situations whenever she’s faced with a potentially traumatic event.
“Flee until your neck hurts so bad you need two epidural steroid injections and daily muscle relaxers and nerve-blockers just to be able to function before your scheduled surgery. Flee until your gut health is so off track you become scared to eat anything that’s not completely bland. And then stop,” she said.
“It’s time to stop doing the fleeing you don’t even know you’re doing,” she continued. “Your brain has emotional pain, yet you are allowing it to sit there and fester in the hidden caverns of your mind. It has nowhere to go despite its need to be released: your pain releases in physical ways so we learn to PAY ATTENTION.”
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In the post, she also expounded on the neck pain she was battling that she says ultimately led to her developing a herniated disc and she revealed that after receiving her diagnosis, she cut off her prescription pain medication “cold turkey” and refrained from following through with the recommended surgical procedure.
“I paid attention to my brain because it’s smarter than me,” the "Intimate Knowledge" podcast co-host said.
Meghan King Edmonds and her estranged husband Jim Edwards. (Instagram)
“I have never felt more in control of my health EVER. Mark my words: I will live to be at least 100 years old and will be a healthy, vibrant old woman until the day I die,” Meghan vowed to her readers, praising the effect of her emotional releases.
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“Gratitude for the trauma I’ve experienced because it helps me grow, learn, and empathize to help others,” she added. “Gratitude for all the little things (that aren’t little): my kids, Hart’s incredible progress, my health, and the best friends and family in the entire world.”
Meghan and Jim split last fall after a series of setbacks in their marriage, beginning with the former MLB slugger's alleged sexting relationship with another woman followed by allegations he had an inappropriate relationship with a nanny.
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In June, Jim admitted he had a "lapse in judgment" regarding the text affair but denied it was physical. In October, he shot down Meghan's allegations of an affair with a nanny and filed for divorce.
Edmonds and Meghan share 3-year-old daughter, Aspen, and 1-year-old twin sons, Hart and Hayes.
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