Biden erupts at reporter for asking about Putin; 'The Five' react
'The Five' wonder why Biden gave Putin a list of 'off-limit' things to hack
This is a rush transcript of "The Five" on June 16, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
DANA PERINO, FOX NEWS HOST (on camera): Hello, everyone. I'm Dana Perino along with Dagen McDowell, Harold Ford, Jr., Jesse Watters, and Greg Gutfeld. It's five o'clock in New York City, and this is THE FIVE.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JOE BIDEN, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: You go what you do all the time? When did I say I was confident? I said --
(CROSSTALK)
UNKNOWN: You said in the next six months you will be able to do --
(CROSSTALK)
BIDEN: What I said was, let's get it straight, I said what will change their behavior is the rest of the world reacts today amid the many system they are stating to the world. I'm not confident of anything, I'm just stating the facts.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO (on camera): President Biden getting a little testy with the press after his meeting with Vladimir Putin, the high stakes summit wrapping up a little earlier than anticipated today. And as expected, cyberattacks were a big topic of discussion.
Putin predictably denied any involvement in the crippling hacks that hit key American infrastructure and claimed the United States is actually the biggest cyberbully in the world. And President Biden responding by saying he gave Vladimir Putin a list of targets that are off-limits.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BIDEN: I talked about the proposition that certain critical infrastructure should be off-limits to attack, period. By cyber or any other means. I gave them a list, if I'm not mistaken, I don't have it in front of me, 16 specific entities.
I pointed out to him, we have significant cyber capability and he knows it.
He doesn't know exactly what it is but it is significant and if, in fact, they violate these basic norms we will respond. There were no threats, just a simple assertion made and no, well, if you do that, then we'll do this with anything I said.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO (on camera): President Biden taking a lot of criticism for holding separate news conferences and giving Putin a solo platform where he was able to attack the United States on challenge in moments like this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
VLADIMIR PUTIN, RUSSIAN PRESIDENT (through translator): In American cities everyday people are killed. That includes the leaders of various organizations, but you can't a word about -- you don't have time to say a word when somebody is killed the entire movement develops, known as Black Lives Matter. I'm not going to comment on that but here's what I do want to say, what we saw was disorder, destruction, violations of the law, et cetera.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO (on camera): All right. By tomorrow this summit will be behind us, Jesse.
JESSE WATTERS, FOX NEWS HOST: Yes.
PERINO: What's your take on everything here?
WATTERS: So, the way I saw it, the Russians hack us and Biden invites Putin to a summit and gives him a list of things he's not allowed to hack?
You got to be kidding me, Dana. There's no consequences, there's no deal, there's nothing concrete. He said Putin is innocent, just some criminals in Russia did it, we'll see if he can stop it, he calls it a constructive summit.
So, then the reporter says, what makes you think that Vladimir Putin is actually going to stop doing this? And Joe Biden says because Vladimir cares about world opinion. Vladimir cares that other people in the world think about him and he wouldn't want to hurt his popularity and the rest of the world.
I'm thinking to myself that's actually Biden. Biden cares about what the Russians think about us, what the Chinese think about it and what the Europeans think. And so, he is not America first because he doesn't want to be the bad guy even if being the bad guy is good for America. He wants to be loved more than respected and that's the key to the Biden doctrine.
Then the reporter says, I think it was Doocy, did you ask Vlad for help about getting to the bottom of the China virus? And Biden says no. No, I didn't really do that. And again, China is really concerned about world opinion and their image in the world is really taking a beating, like China is going to say yes, it came from the lab just to boost their popularity.
He doesn't get it.
Next reporter, Mr. President, you are saying the hacks came from inside Russia but Vlad is saying no, they didn't. Actually, hacks come from America. So how is this a constructive conversation? And Biden snaps at the reporter, loses his cool, wags his finger in her face and at this point he knows he screws up. No discipline, and he has to go clean it up on the tarmac before he gets back on the jet.
PERINO: Can I play that?
WATTERS: Sure.
PERINO: All right. Here is the tarmac scene right after the press conference, here you go.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BIDEN: Look, to be a good reporter you got to be. You have a negative view of life, OK? It seems to me the way you all. You never ask a positive question.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO (on camera): All presidents get mad because reporters ask questions and under like sunshine and light.
WATTERS: Yes. Right. So, it didn't go well, he knew it didn't go well, so he had to take some more questions and ends up basically trying to convince the press that something came out of the summit when nothing came out of the summit. And it looks to me like even the reporters now know, Biden is just about talk for the sake of talk, he's not about action.
PERINO: It's like, I was thinking, Greg, this is an analogy, I haven't thought it all the way through, and I have not asked permission, I will give myself permission now. Like, I've never been to marriage counseling but imagine that the first meeting of marriage counseling between really contentious partners would be like this where they afterwards have to come out and like have a separate phone call. Like, they cannot be seen together.
GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS CO-HOST: Yes. Well, that's not how it goes.
PERINO: How does it go?
WATTERS: tell us.
GUTFELD: I, to Jesse's point, the most bizarre part of this whole thing was when he said, in an effort to sound tough, here's the list of American entities that are off limits which makes it suggests, you mean there are entities that are on limits? So, what's that list? The first one is Fox News.
PERINO: Yes.
GUTFELD: You guys can have Fox News. But if you go after my dear CNN, we're not talking even, you know, I think they did because Stelter, what's his name? Stelter?
WATTERS: Stelter.
GUTFELD: His ratings have dropped 76 percent. I think I'd blame that on Putin. OK. Here's the take home. I got side track. Putin got a pipeline, we got captain cranky pants. So great job, shades. Not only did Putin have the energy, he went home with the energy. Biden seem way more defensive. He was like a teenager yelling I did my homework, you know, to the parents, meanwhile Putin is kind of like a relaxed, alert iguana basking on a river rock.
It felt as totally odd. And then this is, it's not entirely Joe's, President Biden's fault. Putin is like how they describe high school in dazed and confused.
Here's an analogy. I get older, they stay the same age. Putin has been there being Putin for five presidents. So, every semester America has to repeat the same class, right? But he gets a new guy every four to eight years so there is a no real incentive for him to develop a long relationship, that was also the same with China as well. So, they keep changing, he, like the girls in high school, just keeps staying the same.
PERINO: Peter Doocy was able to yell out a question and it got answered.
But it was trying to finally connect what I think the elephant in the room, Harold, that Russia and China are getting closer together and there's financial relationships there and possible other cooperation.
HAROLD FORD, JR., FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Look, I have a slightly different take on the summit. I think it was two adults who don't like or trust one another, I think it was our president making clear to him, I found it a little odd saying these are off limits and I think the second question is what's on limits.
But I think he basically said to him, we know you did it, you're going to say you didn't do it. And when he -- how he reacted to that in the meeting I don't know. But I thought, again, he reset the relationship with Russia, laid out very clearly, we are two adults and here's what you can expect from me going forward and what you can expect from the United States.
There will be detractors, and Jesse, I don't necessarily agree with all the things you said but I understand some of the frustration that some may have with how this might have gone and we are looking for big deliverables. The big deliverable for me was that he went to the G7 and NATO reunited us there, and then went to Putin, it's like I'm speaking on behalf of the world here.
You're not going to have the reign, the free reign you had over the last several years, you've gone through five presidents, you may go to two more, but I'll tell you this. Your big challenge, Putin, is that you want to be relevant and you are no longer relevant. We are going to organize our national security strategy over the next 10 years around how to beat China in a new cold war. You are old news, you are bad news and if you do more we will retaliate, that's what I heard.
WATTERS: Yes. I don't think we are speaking the same language, Harold. I don't think Putin has had free reign for the last few years, he just got a pipeline and then he got a summit and then there is no consequences for the hacks. So, I think what we might be talking at the differences --
(CROSSTALK)
PERINO: We'll see what that deliverables are, right? The summit is one thing, Dagen, but then that's the follow through, so where do we go from here?
DAGEN MCDOWELL, FOX NEWS BUSINESS CORRESPONDENT: Right. I'm waiting to see how many of these 16 targets get hacked. Because he basically just told Vladimir Putin, --
(CROSSTALK)
WATTERS: That's a good one.
MCDOWELL: -- they are --
WATTERS: They don't like that one.
MCDOWELL: -- they are our most valuable assets.
WATTERS: Yes.
MCDOWELL Have at it. Number one. Number two, I didn't quite like Biden's holier-than-stance - holier-than-thou stance on human rights abuses given the fact that his secretary of state, Tony Blinken punted bigly when he met with people from the Chinese Communist Party back in March. I mean, he got us handed to him quite frankly.
So on that front, Russia is the J.V. team when it comes to human rights abuses compared to China, so if Biden when and if he ever meets Xi Jinping he needs to step up and not let murderous tyrant or tyrants tell us what's right and wrong and say hey, Uyghurs, two million people in concentration camps and go through the list.
I did like there's some decent stage craft going on with Biden today, where is like, the sun is getting hot and he doffed his suit coat --
(CROSSTALK)
GUTFELD: I got -- I was so excited.
MCDOWELL: -- and folds it and then he's got his aviators at the ready, it created that moment of like, goody, grandpa still knows how to drive a stick.
PERINO: I tell you that, but in terms of like stagecraft, the advance work by the Americans compared to the Russians was much better in terms of the backdrop for the press conference. That is well done.
GUTFELD: Can I point out that there is going to be something, when Trump ever said anything that was like directionally true but may be false or whatever, he'd be fact-checked to hell. No one is going to fact-check President Biden. So, I have to point out that when Joe said that the people who breached the capitol killed an officer, I was under the impression that that's not the case and that a police officer actually killed an unarmed female protester, that wasn't mentioned.
So, I think that he was -- when he said that the people that breach the capitol killed an officer, I think he was being harder on Trump than he would've been on Putin which is pretty divisive for the grand unifier. But that's not going to be fact-checked, of course.
PERINO: All right. Up next, liberals are attacking Jon Stewart after the comedian touts the COVID lab leak theory. We'll talk about it.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
FORD (on camera): Jon Stewart taking some heat from some on the left who were upset with his support of the Wuhan lab leak theory.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JON STEWART, COMEDIAN: There is a novel respiratory coronavirus overtaking Wuhan, China, what do we do? You know who we could we ask? The Wuhan novel respiratory coronavirus lab. The disease is the same name as the lab. So, wait a minute. You work at the Wuhan respiratory coronavirus lab? How did this happen? And they are like, a pangolin kissed a turtle.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
FORD (on camera): A Washington Post columnist is slamming the comedian in an op-ed, quote, "Jon Stewart's rant is a reminder. Don't rely on celebrities for COVID-19 theories." And the former head of the CDC not backing away from his belief on where COVID came from.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ROBERT REDFIELD, FORMER DIRECTOR, CENTERS FOR DISEASE CONTROL AND
PREVENTION: I don't think it's plausible that this virus went from a bat to an animal we still don't know that animal. And then went into humans and immediately learned how to be human to human transmissible to the point of now causing one of the greatest pandemics we've had in the history of the world.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
FORD (on camera): So, some say he might not have been telling the truth and he may have been joking. Greg, you've got a good handle on seriousness and comedy, was he telling the truth or --
GUTFELD: Yes, I think the big revelation here is that Jon Stewart watches Fox News. Because this is exactly what we've been saying at this table for a while. And it makes sense he's now in our age group where the wisdom kicks in or maybe his writer because I think it was this show or Gutfeld show when I said, when there's a firework explosion in a small town, you check the fireworks factory.
And his writer wrote something that, if there is a chocolate explosion, you check the chocolate factory. So, I think this was so shocking to Colbert and others it's because they live in a bubble and they haven't heard this opinion where, as you've heard this opinion and other opinions here on Fox, we talked about this plausible theory, we've done segments on it. But in places like The View where the only information they get is from People magazine. They are like, my God, this is so amazing. It's just anybody who's shocked by this reveals the ignorance of the actual topic.
FORD: Dana, you know, White House is have to be able to respond when bad things happen to try to make sure we are prepared. Are we, I'm assuming that China, unless they us in, you have to assume the worst case --
(CROSSTALK)
PERINO: I think you have to -- I think that's right. I think you have to assume the worst and China needs to know that we all assume the worst. And the left is confusing. So, if this were called the Moscow virus and then it all started in Moscow, do you think that they would be like, reluctant to find out the root cause of like and how this virus got up there?
And to Dr. Redfield's point, one of the big problems early on is that because China wasn't open about what was going on there. We were treating, the CDC, was treating this as another SARS outbreak, which is you treat SARS in a different way than you treat coronavirus.
So, a White House or administration, if they don't have clear information you are going to maybe treat the wrong problem. And that's possibly lost to someone and led to a lot of people losing their lives and their livelihoods, and so you just wonder, like, when is the left going to get mad.
FORD: Well, speaking of the left getting mad, Jesse, you have a --
WATTERS: What? Did I make them out again?
FORD: Yes.
WATTERS: I think this is safe, this is funny, it's common sense but it's safe. We've known for a year it likely came from a lab, Biden now says it's OK to talk about, Fauci and the Washington Post and CNN say this is OK to talk about. So, then he cracks as joke about the lab. And the lab says, bold, this is edgy, he went there. He didn't go there. The guy is retired.
The only reason he makes a joke like this is because he doesn't work for the corporate media. When you work for the corporate media you can't cut against the narrative. The narrative was this can't come from a lab because they have so much money over there invested in Beijing.
Time Warner, AT&T, Comcast, they are not going to send a team of investigators over to the Wuhan lab and start poking around, there's too much at stake, the Chinese will just take away their license and their deals and their contracts and it's over. So, you can't even say something that's obvious if that is -- it goes against the profit margin.
Look, they did it with Smollett. Smollett the type of guy at midnight in below freezing going to go out for a subway sandwich.
GUTFELD: You would.
WATTERS: You say that and they'll call you a racist. Remember? Or what about Kavanaugh. It doesn't really strike me as a gang rapist. No, you can't say that, that's sexist. And now, you know, do the Chinese, are they really giving Hunter Biden a diamond because they are best friends? No, it's a bribe. But if you say something the corporate media doesn't like because it interferes with their bottom line, they're going to excommunicate you. He doesn't have to deal with that anymore because he's retired and he works on a farm now.
GUTFELD: Does he?
WATTERS: Yes, he has a little farm.
GUTFELD: No wonder the beard.
WATTERS: Yes, he's in the character.
FORD: Dagen, how should -- how should the business community, what should they be urging President Biden to do with China?
MCDOWELL: They are in the bag with the communist party of China. If any company wants to do business in China, they are carrying water for Xi Jinping at all and that's what so disgusting and you've seen it with the complete reticence to call out, well, human rights abuses in China. So, Greg, I have to apologize to you, I think I stole that line from you, too.
I didn't know it and I feel like a hill (Ph).
GUTFELD: We both did it. We shared that -- we shared the same thoughts.
MCDOWELL: I like that. But I want to take - my take on this is, this is Jon Stewart beginning to reclaim comedy in a way that -- because it's been held hostage by thin-skinned liberals.
GUTFELD: I hope you're right.
MCDOWELL: And, so you cannot write jokes that land around the micro- sensitivities of a bunch of left-wing nuts. So, he goes on Colbert knowing that Colbert he made that guy's career, although it seems to be, you know, spiraling downward the toilet bowl given the, you know, the lack of laughs on that late-night show.
But there is nothing funnier than a comic ridiculing, knocking the stuffing out of a sour, arrogant, self-important blowhard. Joan Rivers did it, Don Rickles did it, and there is no bigger sour, self-important, arrogant blowhard than Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart did it right in front of them, basically threw it in his face and I ate it up but I won't be watching that show, watch Greg Gutfeld every night, though.
GUTFELD: There you go. It's going to be great tonight.
FORD: I didn't know the (Inaudible) guy is Greg. But coming up, Chuck Schumer and Democrats sat to ditch Republicans and go it along on President Biden's trillion-dollar agenda.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
WATTERS (on camera): Chuck Schumer is getting ready to ram through President Biden's radical agenda that will cost us trillions. Democrats planning to spend up to $4 trillion on Biden's left-wing plan that would transform the entire economy and that number doesn't even include infrastructure. Axios is reporting the party wants to focus on their climate agenda. Senator Tom Cotton slamming the move that could remake America.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
SEN. TOM COTTON (R-AK): One reason why Chuck Schumer and Joe Biden are watching these bipartisan negotiations is they don't have the votes for a partisan bill yet and I'm not sure they will ever get it, if they want to spend tax and spend to the tune of $4 trillion to once again give away things like tax breaks to rich people for electric vehicles.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WATTERS (on camera): Capitol Hill correspondent Dana Perino with an update. What do we have now, Dana?
PERINO: Well, there's all these different bills going back and forth like, can we get something done. So, 20 senators, 10 Republicans and Democrats have said they have come together and they support this bipartisan framework that basically would not do all that human infrastructure they're talking about --
WATTERS: Good.
PERINO: -- but all the other things. However, Wall Street Journal editorial board this morning had a great piece in which they said, be careful of this because it could be a wolf in sheep's clothing. If Republicans can, like get suckered -- suckered into -- willingly vote for this, that might give the Democrats a chance to do the other bigger stuff that they really want like all the human infrastructure stuff, on reconciliation which is like waving the white flag of surrender.
WATTERS: Republicans getting snookered, I've heard that story a few times.
Greg, wolf in sheep's clothing?
GUTFELD: Cultural appropriation.
WATTERS: I'm sorry.
PERINO: I said it.
GUTFELD: Yes. But I'm just no, I'm saying no.
(CROSSTALK)
PERINO: I'm going to get cancelled.
GUTFELD: It's the wolf. The wolf is pretending to be a sheep, that's cultural appropriation in the animal world.
PERINO: That's outrageous.
GUTFELD: It is outrageous.
PERINO: Cancel that wolf.
GUTFELD: I mean, you know, wolf, if you are watching, be happy with who you are. You don't have to pretend to be a sheep. We love all animals here.
WATTERS: They were born --
PERINO: Animals are great.
WATTERS: -- in sheep clothing.
GUTFELD: Yes. Yes. One thing we will never know about this trillion dollar climate change money dump is the opportunity cost, right, for other issues that have a more immediate effect on human pleasure, human life, like solving the homeless issue, the mentally ill, the education system which is at the pits, helping blacks get back on the homeownership ladder.
All of these things with trillions of dollars could be solved like that, instead we're chasing of one-degree Celsius under the false assumption that somehow we're tying extreme weather to climate change when even the government data shows no correlation. So that's what I have to say. I would tell everybody --
(CROSSTALK)
WATTERS: Very good.
GUTFELD: -- to read Bjorn Lomborg. He's really good on the stuff.
WATTERS: Yes, he is very good and so is the tax foundation, Dagen, nonpartisan think tank says this is going to -- I love saying nonpartisan think tank.
(CROSSTALK)
MCDOWELL: That gives me tummy bubble. That gives me tummy bubble.
WATTERS: But I say tax foundation --
GUTFELD: THE FIVE is a nonpartisan think tank.
WATTERS: Yes. Yes. So, they are saying this is going to cost the country what, trillions of dollars, lose jobs, decrease wages, what do you think?
MCDOWELL: Let the Democrats spend, spend, spend, it will be mayhem in the midterms for the Democrats if they keep doing this. Core inflation is running at the fastest pace in 30 years and you have investors talking about, we already are seeing double-digit inflation.
PERINO: Yes.
MCDOWELL: A hundred-dollar oil is on the way and energy crisis. So, when that arrives and gasoline prices have gone through the roof -- when that arrives, how is Joe Biden -- how are the Democrats going to explain killing the Keystone Pipeline, banning lease -- oil and gas leases on federal land which judges shut down and told Biden that he can't do that, he doesn't have the authority.
They rejoin the Paris Climate accord. They suspended leases in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. So, spend and then you crush our energy infrastructure. That will bite them where the sun doesn't shine?
WATTERS: Well, let's ask a Democrat here. What do you think the White House should say when we see huge surges in gas prices and goods this summer?
FORD JR.: Well, I think you heard the Fed chair today say that we should expect to have rate hikes between now and the end of 23 or mid-23, the end of 23. Look, there was an election last year and President Biden ran on all these ideas in the country, the country elected him. And he's now -- we shouldn't be surprised that he's acting on a lot of the things that he said he was going to act on.
WATTERS: I never heard about trillions and trillions and trillions. I just
-- maybe I wasn't paying attention.
FORD JR.:The infrastructure bill I hope passes because as much as we may say it's too big or too small, depending on where you may be sitting. Some progressives thinks it's too small, some conservatives think it's too big.
The challenges we face with infrastructure from roads and bridges and broadband and our energy and telco infrastructure, all that needs to be updated.
So, I hope that this thing is bipartisan, but I'm not afraid. If the President has to go it alone, I hope he doesn't -- and based on Dana's incredible reporting, it sounds like we're going to have a bipartisan --
PERINO: I read a press release.
GUTFELD: And you're on the street.
FORD JR.: And you're not going to have a hold all the Democrats together anyway. You're going to have to have some Republican support. So, it's likely going to be a bipartisan solution to infrastructure.
MCDOWELL: The left don't want people driving, period. They think cars, even the electric ones, are evil. So, you know, that's why it was less -- it's five percent in the big infrastructure bill. Oh, and by the way, I was not insulting President Biden by calling him his dead son's name, so don't send me hate tweets.
WATTERS: Yes, she called him Beau Beau --
MCDOWELL: Right.
WATTERS: -- instead. It's not insulting. Coming up, corrupt Hunter Biden is set to cash in to the tune of millions.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
MCDOWELL: I guess as the Burisma money ran out, Hunter Biden is apparently an artist now. He's selling his abstract works for as much as half million dollars per painting. So, who's buying this crap? Hunters art dealer says sales are confidential, which is raising the question once again of whether the first one is selling access. Greg Gutfeld, influence peddling.
GUTFELD: Well, he went from one scam to another. But this one's better because before, he was the guy that was having to explain why he didn't deserve six figures a month for a job in which he wasn't qualified for.
Now, he's going to have to try to explain why he doesn't deserve six figures for painting things that look like tramp vomit. I don't know if you've seen the pictures.
But it's easy to be an imposter in this art world because they're all imposters, aren't they? It's like no one knows art and they play off everybody's insecurities, so nobody really was saying, hey, that's not art.
No, they'll just say, oh, that's pretty good and maybe it's for influenced.
But even he's in on the joke because he paints with a straw.
PERINO: I love that.
GUTFELD: And once -- and what is he known for? You know, he used to snort blow with a straw. Now, he uses -- he uses it to blow paint. That's like O.J. Simpson deciding to go to chef school using the same knives.
MCDOWELL: I went -- I majored in art history.
WATTERS: You do?
GUTFELD: No wonder you're here.
MCDOWELL: Yes. And I know -- and I know that there are a lot of stupid rich people who want to buy some access.
WATTERS: Or smart rich people that buy some access. So, you can have a Russian billionaire hand the Biden family a half a million dollars, and the Biden family just gives the guy a watercolor back. And we're not supposed to say wait a second, the media has no clue what's going on here. That would be like Don Jr. taking up sculpting. And so, he just whittles a little sphere -- you know, it's a hunter. He whittles a spear, and then some Russian gives him a half a million, and the media is going to say, oh, that sounds like it's a straight deal. Of course, not. They're violating every spirit of the law. I mean, what's this? It's got to be illegal to do this, right? It has to be illegal.
MCDOWELL: Well, I'm sure the FBI would be interested in looking into it, given that they're investigating his taxes and other things. So, Harold, you were sitting in front of Andy Warhol painting one time, and you don't know it was Andy Warhol. So, what do you think of -- as an amateur, what do you think of his art?
FORD JR.: Look, I don't -- I don't buy a lot of art. But I don't begrudge a guy --
MCDOWELL: That was not your mouth.
FORD JR.: I don't begrudge a guy for trying to make a living. And if he -- if it turns out there's something that's not aboveboard here, I'm certain you'll find out. And based on your comments, someone's probably going to look into it this afternoon. But I don't -- I don't begrudge the guy. Maybe Hunter and former President Bush may come together and do some --do something together.
GUTFELD: Yes.
WATTERS: Yes. I don't think Bush is selling it to Saudi billionaires, though.
FORD JR.: But we don't know who he is selling it to.
WATTERS: Exactly, because they won't tell you.
PERINO: I don't think President Bush was selling anything.
FORD JR.: I don't even know if he's sold anything.
WATTERS: Oh, he's going to sell. Trust me.
FORD JR.: We'll see.
MCDOWELL: I just -- I think about like this. Who in their right mind would go and pay -- and by the way, these numbers are just total BS because they just make them up.
GUTFELD: Eight-six numbers.
MCDOWELL: Right, exactly. But who would actually go and even spend $5,000 on one of these paintings and put it in their (INAUDIBLE) and then people come over and they're like, look at my Biden.
WATTERS: Look at my Biden.
MCDOWELL: You'll be laughed out at town.
PERINO: I didn't think some of the paintings were that bad. I've -- and I -
- when I was a kid, I used to love doing that blow art thing. I don't know if I was that good, but I kind of liked it.
GUTFELD: Is that what you called it, blow art?
PERINO: And the art world -- in the art world -- I mean, there's a lot of shady stuff that goes on in the art world. It's a lot -- it's a place to hide a lot of money.
GUTFELD: Yes.
PERINO: And so, that's why this is maybe a little --
GUTFELD: A lot of brushes with the law.
PERINO: Oh, very good. Let's just end it right there.
MCDOWELL: Yes.
PERINO: Brushes with the law.
MCDOWELL: Let's -- we got more --
GUTFELD: Brushes with the law tonight at 9:00.
PERINO: Hannity is going to love it.
GUTFELD: Yes, there you go. Hunter Biden.
MCDOWELL: "THE FASTEST" is up next.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
GUTFELD: Welcome back. Time for "THE FASTEST." First up, U.S. track and field stars Shelby Houlihan hope to compete in the Tokyo Olympics. Instead, she got hit with a four-year suspension after testing positive for a steroid. And she says a burrito was to blame.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
SHELBY HOULIHAN, OLYMPIC ATHLETE. A pig offal has high concentrations of nandrolone in this food truck that I happen to go to that night. I've eaten there a lot before. And this food truck serves pig offal as part of their menu. 10 hours later, at the peak of when it's supposed to be in your body when you're digesting it, I happened to get tested.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Interesting. You know, Dana, ironically, a bad burrito usually gives you the runs, but in her case, it prevented her from running.
PERINO: It has.
GUTFELD: Has we learned a lesson here? Don't have burritos --
PERINO: I was thinking like -- you eat a lot of bacon, right?
GUTFELD: I eat --
PERINO: I wonder if you would test positive for that.
GUTFELD: I would test positive for being a pig.
PERINO: No.
GUTFELD: Like you know, the amount of pork that I eat, oh, it's disgusting.
PERINO: Anyway, I mean, there's a big debate. Like, she says she's telling the truth. There are a lot of people that don't believe her. They're appealing the case. She doesn't know what's going to happen, but she's probably not going to make it to the Olympics this year.
GUTFELD: Great reporting again, Dana. Harold, that's amazing. She just -- she's a master of all stories. What do you do -- what do you -- what happens here? Do we believe her? Do we not believe her, Harold?
FORD JR.: Look, it must have been one heck of a burrito. I'm like, yes, I want to give her the benefit of the doubt. I hope they go through the appeals process and I hope she gets to compete. But I'm curious if she's ever eaten there before. She said that she got tested when she -- at the height.
PERINO: She said she's been there before, yes.
FORD JR.: So, it's curious to me why it might -- why it might not have shown up before. Maybe the test was a longer period of time after the --
PERINO: Random.
FORD JR.: Right. So, who knows?
GUTFELD: What's -- why would you be taking -- well, like, if you're a long- distance runner -- maybe I'm silly on this one, but steroids, what do you need it for? She doesn't look like she's on anything.
WATTERS: Well, I don't know, Greg. What do I know about steroids? But thank God they don't test us and Fox.
GUTFELD: Yes.
WATTERS: So, here's a narrative, Greg.
GUTFELD: Yes.
WATTERS: The narrative is the Americans are clean no matter what. And the Russians and the Chinese are dirty.
GUTFELD: OK.
WATTERS: And even if we're dirty, we're still clean.
GUTFELD: There you go.
WATTERS: That is the narrative.
PERINO: Yes, I like it. I like it.
GUTFELD: What do you think of that narrative, Dagen?
MCDOWELL: It's awesome. I'm not going to disagree with Jesse because he's on steroids. No, no, you're not. I have a different take on this. I've been thinking about it. Like, I -- so, this is Oregon me from hog, awful. I ate a lot of that in the south. You eat everything but the oink, so you eat all the organs. I eat a lot of head cheese which is --
WATTERS: Wait, wait, what is that?
PERINO: We'll tell you in the break. We'll tell you in the commercial.
MCDOWELL: It's brain -- it's brains made with gelatin and aspic. So, I just wonder if this is the reason I never developed breasts.
WATTERS: You'll have a burrito.
GUTFELD: Yes.
MCDOWELL: Well, I'm serious. I gave this a lot of thought today.
GUTFELD: Interesting.
WATTERS: Oh, boy.
GUTFELD: All right, next up, after the pandemic streaming fatigue is setting in, apparently people think they're just way too many options and they're getting exhausted. So, Jesse, I thought streaming fatigue was that fourth time you get up in the middle of night to pee.
WATTERS: Yes, I don't have streaming fatigue. I have baby fatigue. We don't watch Netflix anymore. We go to bed at 9:30, I get up at five. We don't do that. I watch the NBA Playoffs and then I go to sleep.
GUTFELD: No Fox?
WATTERS: No.
GUTFELD: You don't watch my show?
WATTERS: No. Sorry, Greg. I hear enough about it in the green room.
GUTFELD: Wow. Even that hurts me.
WATTERS: I've heard good things though.
GUTFELD: Dagen, my theory is that the fatigue is caused by the realization that what you're watching wasn't worth it. Do you know how -- like, they're
-- like they're taking like -- they're taking something that should be a two-hour movie, and they turn it into five episodes or seven episodes. And so, they have to fill it up with this other nonsense dialogue and ancillary characters that you don't -- like, I watched a show where they go off on some character for an episode and you'll never see him again. What was that show? The Mayor of --
MCDOWELL: The Mayor of Easttown.
GUTFELD: Yes. She had developed a boyfriend played by that Australian guy.
And what's the point of that relationship, because it never comes back?
PERINO: Yes, they do.
GUTFELD: What a mistake. I'm sorry.
MCDOWELL: I can tell you the point of the relationship. You want me to tell you?
GUTFELD: Sure.
MCDOWELL: It was to show her middle-aged body. That way, it was -- it's a total setup. It's like oh, she's --
GUTFELD: I could have done that myself.
MCDOWELL: -- oh, she's relatable now. So, you get to see your, you know --
GUTFELD: Yes, your --
MCDOWELL: Those things.
GUTFELD: The things.
MCDOWELL: I -- there's -- I would not have gotten through COVID if I had not -- the only thing I could watch for two and a half weeks was every episode of every season of RuPaul's Drag Race, because it is so awesome.
It's just like fun and happy and it's biting and like the humor. Nothing is off-limits. So, after that I was done.
GUTFELD: It's sports -- it's sports for people who hate sports. That's the way I look at it.
MCDOWELL: Yes.
GUTFELD: Harold, do you -- did you stream anything? Was there anything that you're hooked on?
FORD JR.: I did. My wife, whom I love to death, has -- got hooked on Gilmore Girls. I've seen every episode of that and every episode of New Girl.
WATTERS: That's not good. Oh, New Girl, I like that.
FORD JR.: I like it.
WATTERS: I take back --
FORD JR.: But I love all the documentaries you can find. Like, I find -- I've watched documentaries on -- I'm a big boxing fan, so I've gone back and watch a lot of things there. So, it's been -- I'm not tired yet.
GUTFELD: Yes. What about you, Dana?
PERINO: I feel that every time we go to log on to something, we have to pay again. And then, I'm like, well, how many subscriptions do I have to Showtime? I mean, I've paid over and over and it's driving me crazy. I think that one of the reasons people have fatigue is because you have to enter your password every time. And you're like, well, what's the password of this one? I don't know. And it's super annoying.
I think if they can figure out a way to streamline it so that there was one way to get into everything, people might not be so tired of it.
GUTFELD: Interesting. I just --
PERINO: But to your point about the length. Did you know that Hemingway documentary that they put was six episodes long, two hours each?
GUTFELD: Yes, that's true.
PERINO: I mean, come on. I love Hemingway too, but that was a lot.
MCDOWELL: Here's the summation of that one. He's drunk and a hack who had mental -- who was mentally ill, and that's it.
PERINO: And he could write. He could write very well.
GUTFELD: All right, finally, scientists now know which part of the brain causes you to doom scroll, which is when you endlessly look at bad news online, and it can lead to better treatments for people who suffer from anxiety or OCD. We know with doom-scrolling is, Dagen. It's just watching CNN.
WATTERS: Yes.
MCDOWELL: Yes, I would actually rather -- I would rather be hit by a meteor than be forced to watch CNN at length, only clips. But, you know, these are feel-good stories for me. Plague of locusts coming, you know, plague of frogs, come on, let's do this.
GUTFELD: Do you like this science, Jesse? It's science. Follow the science, believe the science.
WATTERS: Yes, I don't know if the science is settled, Greg. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not -- I'm not into all that doom-scrolling stuff. I think
-- I don't think the world's going to end in nine years like they say.
GUTFELD: No, no, maybe 12.
WATTERS: I think I'll be around.
GUTFELD: No, I hope -- I hope you're not around.
WATTERS: Everybody will make --
GUTFELD: I hope the world exceeds you.
WATTERS: Thank you.
GUTFELD: Yes.
WATTERS: Well, I'm younger than you are, so that's science.
GUTFELD: Dana, is this going -- do you think this is going to be helpful.
PERINO: I found the opposite. I found happy scrolling on reels. If you put in Vizla dogs, and you could just spend hours scrolling through and watching all these silly dogs. I love that.
GUTFELD: I do -- I do get lost in things and all of a sudden I realized there's like 100 windows open. I'm not going to tell you what I was looking at, but it is like, Oh my God, what was I doing for the last six and a half minutes?
Harold, do you -- do you screw up on yourself scrolling?
FORD JR.: I don't. I don't. I more -- I'm more of Joel Ornstein kind of guy. I tweet a lot of his things. I don't look back and I try to stay positive.
GUTFELD: There you go. Good for you.
FORD JR.: Which is why I'm a big fan of Jesse.
GUTFELD: Yes. You know, he saved the world.
WATTERS: Don't look back.
GUTFELD: "ONE MORE THING" is up next.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
PERINO: It's time for "ONE MORE THING." Check out this dog. He is amazing.
Look how high he can jump. Oh, I should have done one of those contests.
OK, there it goes, five-ten. Can he do this one, six? Oh, my gosh, six-two.
Check him out, dog diving. This dog is amazing. Six-four, six-six, I mean, can you imagine? He's just having the time of his life. Jesse, you got to try this at the pool, seven-O. There he goes. I don't know how long this goes. I mean --
WATTERS: I can't stop staring at it.
PERINO: Oh, seven-two.
WATTERS: This is mesmerizing.
GUTFELD: Dana, this is -- those are all different dogs, and they all drown.
This is a terrible thing.
GUTFELD: Yes. Well --
GUTFELD: It's like that weird magician movie. Remember, they were actually not -- they're not the same magician. They were actually dying every time.
PERINO: I don't know that one. I just wanted to mention one other thing.
There's this little book called Gigi at the White House. Gigi McBride -- her mother, Anita McBride worked as a chief of staff to First Lady Laura Bush. Gigi is now in college. She decided to put her little memories in these little books. So, if you want to know about the White House, there you go. Check it.
WATTERS: That's the best last name, by the way, McBride.
PERINO: McBride.
WATTERS: Any first name goes with McBride.
PERINO: It could be president.
WATTERS: Try it.
GUTFELD: How about Mick?
WATTERS: Mick McBride, I like it. I like it.
PERINO: Greg, you're next.
GUTFELD: All right, this is getting really weird check out this picture, OK. So, this is the second time this week that this fellow has showed up at a baseball game holding this sign. He was in Detroit at a Tigers-White Sox game last week on Friday. And now, today, he was in, I guess, Kansas City for Kansas City Royals game.
They call him Tiger Man. But I just got to let him know, I don't know who he is, but -- I don't know who you are. I'm already married, and you're not even my type. You're a he, not a she. But, you know, it's -- I am flattered.
PERINO: Maybe he wants you to -- as you said, like, maybe he wants you to officiate the wedding.
GUTFELD: Oh, no, no, no. He wants to marry me. I can tell. He's got the look.
PERINO: I mean, really he wouldn't.
WATTERS: You get this a lot.
GUTFELD: I get it -- I get it a lot. A lot of men propose to me. And they propose a lot of things.
PERINO: Jesse. Take it away, Jesse.
WATTERS: All right, remember when Greg cyber-bullied me?
GUTFELD: Yes.
WATTERS: Roll it.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: You need to send all your cat videos showing cats trying to destroy your life to me care of Jesse Watters work e-mail.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WATTERS: Well, yes, the cyberwar is still on. I'm getting these in my inbox among many others. Here's just one example of a creepy cat video all thanks to Gutfeld. Thanks, Greg.
GUTFELD: You're welcome.
WATTERS: Thank you.
PERINO: That one is like crying. He had tears.
GUTFELD: Oh, my goodness. Oh, that one, adorable. Look at the one on the left.
WATTERS: Yes, you should see my inbox.
PERINO: Dagen.
MCDOWELL: So, Greg, here's a couple you can marry.
GUTFELD: Oh great.
MCDOWELL: Tom Bedard and Raya Maday met about five years ago. They're both meteorologists at AccuWeather. They drove over Memorial Day weekend, six hours, to see their first tornado together. And boom, he proposed and that's the end of that. They -- we don't know if they survived.
PERINO: Was there a twist?
MCDOWELL: No, I'm just kidding.
WATTERS: I thought the tornado is going to blow the ring out of his hand.
MCDOWELL: They fled the -- they fled the tornado. There you go. Beautiful ring. Best wishes.
PERINO: A match made in heaven. Harold.
FORD JR.: I like -- I would bring it back to people for one moment. There's a family in the U.K., six generations of family. Mary Marshall who's standing in the middle is 86, holding her 90th grandchild. They all live within about 10 or 15 minutes of one another. And Mary became the first great, great, great grandma in Scotland with the birth of -- with the birth of Nyla there. So, congratulations. What a family.
WATTERS: Living 10 to 15 minutes of your entire family. That sounds tough.
I don't know about you, I'd move. No offense mom and dad. I love you, guys.
I'm talking about my sister.
PERINO: We love all of you.
GUTFELD: Talking about my sister.
PERINO: That's it for us. "SPECIAL REPORT" is up next. Hi, Bret.
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