Updated

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," August 25, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST (on camera): Hi. I'm Greg Gutfeld with Dagen McDowell, Jessica Tarlov, Jesse Watters, and a ravioli is her thru pillow, Dana Perino. THE FIVE.

Team Biden is giving the Taliban the benefit of the doubt. Caving to the terror group's demands that all U.S. troops be out in a week and trusting that the militants will fully cooperate with ongoing evacuations.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JOE BIDEN, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: The completion by August 31st depends upon the Taliban continuing to cooperate and allow access to the airport. Thus far, the Taliban have been taking steps to work with us so we can get our people out.

JEN PSAKI, WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETARY: There's a reality that the Taliban is currently controlling large swaths of Afghanistan.

ANTONY BLINKEN, U.S. SECRETARY OF STATE: The Taliban have made public and private commitments to provide and permit safe passage for Americans. It's been important to work with them.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD (on camera): Reports from the ground show little desire for cooperation. The Taliban blocking access for Afghans trying to reach the Kabul airport and tearing up their paper work. Secretary of State Antony Blinken doing more damage control today.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BLINKEN: There could be other Americans in Afghanistan who never enroll with the embassy, who ignored public evacuation notices and have not yet identified themselves to us. We also found that many people who contact us and identify themselves as American citizens including by filling out and submitting repatriation assistance forms are not, in fact, U.S. citizens, something I can take some time to verify.

Some Americans may choose to stay in Afghanistan, some who are enrolled and some who are not, this effort does not end on August 31st, it will continue for as long as it takes to help get people out of Afghanistan who wish to leave.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD (on camera): But we can rest easy, everyone. Now the kinder, gentler Taliban is vowing to tackle climate change. The member of the group's cultural commission talking to Newsweek, quote, "we believe the world has a unique opportunity of rapprochement - is that what he said - and coming together to tackle the challenges not only facing us but the entire humanity. These challenges ranging from world security and climate change need the collective efforts - I'm doing to college - of all and cannot be achieved if we exclude or ignore an entire people who have been devastated by imposed wars for the past four decades."

Wow, it sounds like someone is aiming for a primetime gig on CNN. So, Dana, Greta Thunberg must be thrilled.

DANA PERINO, FOX NEWS CO-HOST: She might have written that.

GUTFELD: Yes. I don't know the Taliban is going to focus on climate change.

PERINO: If you want to be accepted by the world community --

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: -- and you don't want your funds to be cut off from the world, you want the World Bank to pay attention to you, you want some countries to lessen sanctions, there's a great way to their heart and they know exactly what it is, it is through climate change.

I mean, they probably looked on social media, and like, how many trends on social media. You just say you're for climate change.

GUTFELD: Right.

PERINO: They're also going to assign eco credit scores to people. That's very progressive, like, what an interesting idea.

GUTFELD: What is your carbon footprint? I mean, don't they just ride goats?

PERINO: They want to be back in the seventh century.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: As far as I know, they weren't a lot -- I mean, the methane issue was a problem back then. I just want to mention one other thing. So, the administration is very mad about the media coverage that they are getting.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: They find, I get it, people complained. But I saw something today that maybe want to repeat. And so, I didn't write this. But basically, it said, you don't get to sink the ship and then brag about the lifeboats but that's what we've been seeing for the past several days.

Yesterday the United States and the U.K., both called special sessions of their legislative bodies, the U.K. basically had a conversation about how we are going to protect and extract our citizens from Afghanistan to bring them home. And the United States special sessions was about how can we had $5 trillion of domestic spending to this agenda. And the Afghanistan was just an afterthought.

GUTFELD: Yes. Insane, Jessica. What do you have to say to this? This is on you.

JESSICA TARLOV, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Yes. I'm calling all the shots in D.C. from my studio here. A couple of things. The savvy with which dictators, terrorists, et cetera, can play the propaganda game, it shouldn't be stunning to us anymore but it is.

You think that you are listening to like one, Putin sits down for an interview, or Lavrov sits down and they know every buzzword. Xi Jinping, right? Like they know exactly how to trigger us, to use her favorite woke word that way. So, I think it's really interesting especially since we heard that the World Bank is going to be withholding funds from them now that they are not a normal country and they're a terrorist organization run land.

One thing that I did think was positive out of Secretary Blinken's briefing is we actually got some numbers about how many Americans were in Afghanistan and how many have been evacuated. So, he said that there were 6,000 Americans who had it since August 14th -- sorry, 6k Americans registered August 14th, 4,500 evacuated since, he believes there will be less than a thousand still in the country.

And I thought the idea of people who do want to keep staying there, it was interesting. Like I can't imagine at this moment being like, hey, no, I'm going to wait this one out. And I get it, there are dual nationals there. So, it will be interesting to see where that goes.

But the 82,000 evacuees, a lot of people are getting out, obviously foreign nationals but a lot of Afghans are getting to other places. They're going to Qatar. They're going to Western Europe and those all seem to be positives.

GUTFELD: Yes. You know, there's a weird thing, Dagen, as American, as our governments keep pushing its way towards wokeism, there is basically no way to deal with something like Afghanistan because we lose the options that a woke, being a woke country would not allow you to do. In a weird way, the Taliban is going to be China's problem and China is going to have no problem dealing with them.

DAGEN MCDOWELL, FOX NEWS BUSINESS CORRESPONDENT: Right.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MCDOWELL: Exactly. It's like we'll -- if the Taliban agrees to turn their head away from the Uyghurs, hey, we'll give you, you know, you let us operate as a terror organization --

GUTFELD: Yes.

MCDOWELL: -- we'll give you mining rights to our rare earth minerals, I mean, our rare earth metals. We need the money. You've got -- I mean, it's just a tolerance of one another. And that, I coined, I was writing this today, the Biden doctrine is empower our enemies, embolden evil, betray and abandon our allies, America on our ass.

But it goes to that point, so the Biden administration with the Taliban has -- treated it as the de facto government from all along recognizing it, elevating it and legitimizing it, trusting it, going back to 2013 when Obama and Biden provided a diplomatic presence to Doha, Qatar for the Taliban but then you throw in they abandoned the Afghan Security Forces, left the power vacuum.

You know, Al Qaeda's ascendant now, 15 provinces since then, but also, remember, why is Al Qaeda a concern now? You know, they had bioweapons lab 20 years ago. You don't think that they've look at China and what's going on with the Wuhan virus killing four and half million people around the globe, that's a possibility and then our allies in Europe are apoplectic.

One more thing. Ron Klain, the chief of staff in the White House, he needs to get off Twitter, he is retreating the hack -- hackity (Ph) hack gas bags, like the worse of the worse like Jennifer Rubin at the Washington Post.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MCDOWELL: He's like retreating her constantly, like being portrayed by Kevin Spacey in a TV movie wasn't bad enough? You got to check it out because it's, I mean, no wonder Biden goes out and talks about build back better yesterday.

GUTFELD: Yes. All right, Jesse, time for gasp Gregg's artificial stance?

JESSE WATTERS, FOX NEWS HOST: What is it?

GUTFELD: All right. I believe that Afghanistan is Joe Biden's North Korea. think about what Trump tried to do is not -- is to convince Kim Jong-un we don't -- we're not interested in defeating you, we just want you out of our lives.

Could you argue that this is what Joe Biden is doing? North Korea is still there but the psychological -- their psychological physical -- the physical tension has decreased. Because Trump basically said, we are not interested. And so, he kind of like, he put North Korea, you are now (Inaudible). Is that what Joe is doing with Afghanistan?

WATTERS: But we won't have hostages in North Korea for the rest of Joe Biden's term.

GUTFELD: Good point. That's why this was an artificial stance. I don't really believe it.

WATTERS: Well that was an official retort to your artificial stance. Joe Biden chose a hostage crisis. He thought that that was the best option, he said we are not going to extend the deadline, he says we're not going to do search and rescue. So, this is going to dog Joe Biden for the rest of his term.

Jimmy Carter only had a year of a hostage crisis. Joe Biden is going to have three years of a hostage crisis. I don't see how he survives this. Now tactically, what is this, the costliest military blunder in United States history? Pearl Harbor they destroyed the Pacific fleet, I don't know if you adjust that for inflation if that matches the $82 billion in U.S. hardware we give to the Taliban.

What, the most embarrassing, Custer's last stand, Little Bighorn?

GUTFELD: Yes, you're going -

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: Bay of Pigs, the Alamo, I mean, the death toll is not the same but in terms of a tactical humiliation this ranks right up there with all of them and now he's kind of blaming the Americans that are still there for not getting rescued. They didn't register at the embassy. No one registers at the embassy. Or we're going to bring back everybody that wants to leave. Who wants to stay --

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: -- under Taliban rule? And now he is going out and he wants credit. This is the fastest airlift. This is the greatest retreat ever. You know, he's thanking the Taliban for letting Americans get to the airport. Americans are getting beaten on the way to the airport, so I don't see how this shakes out right now. I mean, say what you want about Trump but at least Trump killed terrorists. Joe Biden takes orders from terrorists.

GUTFELD: There you go. That's the money quote. Took him a while to get there, though.

Anyway, Democrats in panic mode as Biden craters in the polls.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNKNOWN: What will you do if Americans are still there after the deadline?

BIDEN: You'll be the first person I'll call.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO (on camera): The way this White House is handling the chaos in Afghanistan becoming an issue as the horrifying images seem to have registered with voters, President Biden's approval rating has plummeted.

So just 41 percent, a dramatic drop for the president who up until a week and a half ago had averaged in the low to mid-50s since taking office, that's pretty high for a modern president with 62 percent of Americans disapproving of his administration's handling of the withdrawal from Afghanistan. The dive sparking worry across the Democratic Party as they fight to keep their narrow House majority in the 2022 midterms.

Jesse, the polls, are you paying attention?

WATTERS: And this is a mainstream media poll, so he's probably at zero percent. In the Real polls, COVID is the only issue that's keeping this guy afloat. And he's down 15 points for COVID approval this summer. So, if Delta really rises, the bottom is going to fall out and there's a few reasons for this.

In this poll he's at 39 percent in the economy and in various other polls he's in the 20s and 30s for the border, energy crisis and Afghanistan. And it's not just policy, it's personal too, in the CBS poll. The majority of American people don't think the guy is competent or focused.

And foreign policy has dogged the Democratic Party since the Cold War and they have really struggled to gain the trust of the American voter over the last several decades and this bungling of Afghanistan is going to set the Democratic Party back pretty far. And Democrats, House and Senate next midterm, are they going to decide, am I going to embrace Joe or am I going to distance myself from Joe?

I don't know is the things are that sexy that they're going to run on. COVID relief, infrastructure, that's not going to jazz people up. Meanwhile, you have Afghanistan, gas prices, crime, open borders, inflation. That's going to be tough and I'm not really sure it's going to work out too well for the Democrats.

PERINO: Jessica, how do you think they'll deal with it?

TARLOV: I think that there's a lot of calculation going on right now to that embracing point, so Joe Biden gave a lot of Democrats a lift that they needed in 2020. He was popular as a person throughout his policies were the most popular out of the Democratic field. Right?

He's the one who always said, open borders a little scary, like we're not, you know, we're not giving away all this free stuff, I'm not Bernie Sanders, I've never been a socialist my whole life. You know, you're a dogged face phony soldier and like, you know exactly who I am.

Now Democrats on the congressional level - and I'm not sure as much on the Senate level - are going to have to make an estimation, what's good for me if you are on the border, they're talking a lot tougher about it. You have Seth Moulton and Peter Meijer bipartisan coalition they went to Afghanistan yesterday really pissed off. Everybody in leadership to see what was going on there.

That's a little bit of a fissure that I think is going to be happening amongst the veterans versus the establishment there where they are saying, you know, I may typically be with you but I feel a kindred spirit to this region, we fought for this in Iraq and Afghanistan, I want to be there.

To the point about foreign policy, though, Barack Obama beat John McCain, who is one of the most highly decorated patriots and people who served this country, it's also the anniversary of his passing --

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: The main issue then was the economy.

TARLOV: I understand that, but we had an election where we were. We obviously had had the Bush years where we got into these wars and Barack Obama did have foreign policy platform and was running against a veteran and he manage to pull that off. So, I'm not -- I don't think it's a --

WATTERS: On substance, Barack Obama was wrong on the surge. McCain was right on the surge. And then when Joe pulled out of Iraq, we got ISIS.

PERINO: ISIS. I know. The Democrats are going to run on $3.5 trillion.

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly. Free, free, free. And also, it does look bad for Joe. But do not overlook the ability of the media to create the narrative that voting for Republican is a vote for systemic racism and inequality. Because that, the choice is never going to be right or wrong. It's always going to be good and evil. And the media knows exactly what side they're on which is the good side. We're evil. I'm evil. I'm OK with that.

You've got to remember; these are the three things from 2020 that the media performed so they'll do anything. Number one, they buried the laptop story to sway an election, that worked because when the poll shows that if they knew about that they would've voted differently.

They bragged about their secret cabal after the election in Time magazine, that massive piece that talked about all the institutions working together and if you dare question any election discrepancy unless it's a Democrat loss you are guilty of the big lie.

So, they are also going to push, they're also going to bring back the insurrection even though obviously it's not an insurrection. The FBI found evidence of some plot. But they are going to be using the I word and the I word bring back those visuals to make you feel that the Republicans are the kind of the Taliban of America which is what they are really going to try to go for.

And it might work because when you are a Republican you are always running against, it's two against one, it's Democrats and the media. So, you got to try harder. And that's why we need more vets running for office because we need some clear idealism in this government.

PERINO: Yes. People side.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: Yes. Dagen, take a look at this exchange between Peter Doocy and Jen Psaki. These exchanges are becoming a little famous.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

PSAKI: Go ahead.

PETER DOOCY, FOX NEWS CORRESPONDENT: Thank you, Jen. At the tail end of the president's remarks today about cybersecurity he was asked about Afghanistan and he made a joke.

PSAKI: I think Peter ask him that question.

DOOCY: The other Peter did. And he made a joke, so what's so funny?

PSAKI: Well, I think the question he was asked, if I remember correctly, was about when he will provide information about a decision on August 31st -- I don't want to paraphrase the question if that wasn't an accurate description of the question.

(CROSSTALK)

DOOCY: Very important to a lot of people watching.

PSAKI: Of course, it's a very important question.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO: Trying to get a sense of the room, I guess.

MCDOWELL: I guess Joe Biden can say, hey, I'm not as bad as Kamala Harris in terms of like, ha, ha, Afghanistan. I don't think that the Biden incumbent Democrats are going to be able to run on calling Americans racist because they just abandoned women and children and set them back potentially centuries to be enslaved and tortured and raped and killed in Afghanistan.

GUTFELD: But they will.

MCDOWELL: They will. The only thing going for them is there is not going to be a lot of video and pictures of it because everybody has fled, you know western journalist for the most part will have fled in the short run, fled Afghanistan running for their lives.

In terms of the -- why Biden is polling so badly on the economy is purely inflation, consumer confidence has fallen to a 10-year low, real wages, or inflation-adjusted wages have fallen every month that Biden has been in office. And now that Democrats have backed themselves into a corner, the only thing that they can brag about is spending more money.

They are going to brag about and it's more like $5 trillion over 10 years, they are going to brag about spending money when they are claiming ownership of causing the inflation if they do that. So, they have to be very careful about that.

Also, all of these new entitlement programs they've created to get the middle class hooked on government like the extra child tax credit that expires but what's in this plan that the Democrats are pushing, that's one of the reasons in the short run that all these jobs are unfilled. It's more than 10 million jobs.

So, when you go to the airport, or stuff is not in stock, the reason that customer service is so bad is because these companies can't hire people.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: Yes.

MCDOWELL: People won't get back on the jobs so the Democrats will win that, too.

PERINO: So much to discuss. Ahead, from Afghanistan to the border crisis. Arizona's attorney general warning terrorists freed by the Taliban could be crossing into the United States.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WATTERS (on camera): And as if things couldn't get any worse, Joe Biden's Afghanistan disaster seems to be bleeding over stateside. Arizona's attorney general warning that terrorists released by the Taliban could be sneaking into our country amid the chaos at the border.

This threat comes as the Biden administration was dealt a huge blow to their immigration plans. The Supreme Court reinstating former President Trump's remain in Mexico policy for asylum-seekers. The policy that requires applicants to wait in Mexico while their claims are evaluated by American authorities.

All right. So, Dana, say a Taliban evacuee gets to Mexico, do you think that Taliban person is going to remain in Mexico?

PERINO: I think the coyotes are going to be like, maybe we should hold this one back.

WATTERS: Yes, what's the fee to smuggle a Taliban across the southern border?

PERINO: Yes.

WATTERS: Probably more than Guatemala.

PERINO: But probably be raising their prices, I would imagine.

WATTERS: Exactly.

PERINO: I know in the U.K., that somebody that was on the U.K.'s no-fly list because of terrorism reasons ended up in the U.K.

WATTERS: Correct.

PERINO: So, they are checking and they're trying to make sure. I think on the remain in Mexico thing, to me, if I were the Biden administration, I would take this as a win. Right? So, you can say to the public --

WATTERS: Yes.

PERINO: -- and the progressives like, these Trump judges really --

WATTERS: Yes.

PERINO: -- they are terrible.

WATTERS: And that's why we need more Supreme Court justices.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: And (Inaudible) put. Tell Breyer to resign but accept the good outcome.

WATTERS: Yes, my hands are tied by the law.

PERINO: Yes.

WATTERS: I'm just following the law, we respect institutions.

MCDOWELL: Yes.

WATTERS: So, the Afghan disaster, obviously he can't execute anything. It remains Americans, Dagen, he can't execute the border, he can't do anything right.

MCDOWELL: Right. When we were watching that video of that child being handed over to the marine in Afghanistan and people are very upset. And like we've seen the same photographs down at of the border --

WATTERS: Yes.

MCDOWELL: -- of toddlers being dropped, dropped over walls by human traffickers. So, again, it's just, it's the same disregard for human life and I say it over and over again. They've laid the foundation for people to profit from human suffering and misery, and they are OK with it. This is a -- but this is a -- this is how -- it does go to Trump's legacy though, the number of judges that he appointed. I looked it up earlier 226 federal judges Trump appointed at, appeals court judges. That was just one less than Obama did in eight years. Really -- I mean, this will pay dividends for years to come.

WATTERS: Thank you, Cocaine Mitch. And I say that with love. Jessica, there is a little bit of a difference between the Afghan asylum seekers and these people crossing the southern border.

TARLOV: That's really generous of you.

WATTERS: I mean, the people crossing the southern border have yet to do anything positive for the United States, haven't done anything at all. Asylum seekers coming from Afghanistan, they have sometimes literally saved American lives being translators, spotters, drivers, but Joe Biden doesn't really do much for them. Hey, if you can make it to the airport, good luck.

TARLOV: So, I don't see things the same way.

WATTERS: There's nothing you can say to refute that.

TARLOV: I went Greg's style. I have a lot of notes on this specifically.

WATTERS: OK, all right. We're a little tight on time.

TARLOV: So -- it shocks me the red lights just starts flashing. I actually did hear two minutes. OK, so there are a lot of people seeking asylum at the southern border who have worked in their home countries and I'm sure with Americans to improve their quality of life back there for millions of people who are destitute, who are raped, pillaged, all the things that are going to be happening in Afghanistan under the Taliban, people coming from Central America. And it is their legal right to seek asylum here. And they should go through the process.

But of course, the interpreter should come, people who fought alongside us, but you shouldn't talk about them like that just because they're coming from a different place. And hopefully, that will get figured -- I'm literally hearing hurry up.

Anyway, the point is, on the Supreme Court ruling, it's actually very unclear. They didn't say what the violation actually was. And the policy, the remain in Mexico policy hasn't been in place since March 2020 anyway. So, it seems like Secretary Mayorkas can just go back to them with more thorough explanation of why they don't want the remain in Mexico policy. They had taken it down because of COVID.

And to the point about the Taliban people getting here, under Trump March 20, 2020, the peace pact, the Afghans had to release 5000 Taliban prisoners in exchange for only 1000 Afghan prisoners. So, if there is Taliban terrorists coming over here to hurt us, it could have been very well released under President Trump but no one talks about that, or you don't talk about that.

WATTERS: You talk about it. Do you talk about it?

GUTFELD: All the time.

WATTERS: You won't stop talking about.

GUTFELD: I won't stop talking about anything, actually, you know. You can't have a border without order. That's all I'm saying. No, actually, I'm going to say is, you know, with rearview mirrors, they always say objects appear closer than they really are. This is another example of the Trump rearview mirror, and that everything in that mirror seems better now when compared to Joe being president.

Trump's policy of remain in Mexico seems like a really innocuous solution to a problem, right? You work with Mexico over a porous border. We cooperate. But out of spite and no logic, Joe killed that because he killed a lot of things that were -- that were related to Trump just because it was Trump. And he just dismantled so many important things as an -- as an irrational response. And I want -- not just him, but the Democrats and the Democrat mayors.

Everything that is -- that is connected to order, whether it's law enforcement, or it's, you know, foreign policy, how to evacuate people, you know, the border, they just -- it just crumbles.

WATTERS: It crumbles.

GUTFELD: They have no sense of order.

PERINO: Take the win.

WATTERS: Take the W says Dana Perino. Coming up, are you kidding me? Liberal leaders are bringing back the push for ready, outdoor mask mandates.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

MCDOWELL: Mask madness is back, making a comeback across the country. Liberal Oregon Governor Kate Brown announcing a statewide outdoor mask mandate regardless of vaccination status.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

GOV. KATE BROWN (D-OR): Effective Friday, August 27, masks will be required in all public outdoor settings where physical distancing is not possible regardless of vaccination status. I know we're all tired of masking. But this simple act of kindness and compassion protects our communities and saves lives.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

MCDOWELL: She's not the only democrat pushing for more masking. Earlier this week, President Biden insisted all parents put masks on their kid's faces anytime they leave the house. GG, it's the forever pandemic.

GUTFELD: Yes. There's no evidence for this oppression. And this is actual oppression. And it's all -- it's basically these politicians are playing CYA with your face. They're covering their ass by having you cover your face. And this is what happens.

And by the way, you know, we said this when the -- we talked about this. We talked about until we understand the acceptance of risk, we are doomed. And these leaders fail to comprehend the cost-benefit analysis that goes into making decisions. So, what happens is you only have one goal and that goal is zero risk, which means all restrictions wrong or unproven are made legitimate, right? Because you want to just get down to zero.

And the only thing that is affected by that are your freedoms. So, it's like sorry, you know, if you -- like what you said, you want to just do something kind, you should wear a mask. That's -- what you're saying is you need to limit your freedoms on this. And that -- people can say, they can take that out of context. Fine. I'm an adult. I can understand benefits and risk. Freedom entails risk. And if you want zero risk, freedom goes away. I don't want that.

MCDOWELL: Dana?

PERINO: Well, do you know the very best time of year to visit the Northwest?

MCDOWELL: No.

PERINO: August. It's the most beautiful place. It's -- it can be hot but there's very little humidity. The skies are usually bright blue and there's so many wonderful outdoor activities to do. And the thing is, kindness is not science. And this whole notion that it would be a nice thing for you to do -- and I like -- I'm kind of nice.

GUTFELD: Tell that to Antifa -- tell that to Antifa in Portland.

PERINO: I mean, you think I'm nice, right?

GUTFELD: No, no. You're a terrible person?

PERINO: Do you think I'm nice?

MCDOWELL: Yes, I do.

PERINO: I do not feel like being nice in putting on a mask. I feel like looking at science to put on a mask. And I walked out today and I don't mind -- I'm looking outside right now. OK, so we got 20 people out there. I would say seven are wearing a mask. Fine. If they want to wear a mask, that's great. Maybe they have a reason to. I'm not going to bother them. But I also think that a mask mandate to be nice is ridiculous.

MCDOWELL: Well, and also, the masks are kind of like a niceness diaper. Like, it's covering your niceness because you can't smile.

PERINO: There you go.

MCDOWELL: Right, Jesse.

WATTERS: I'm just sick of politicians punishing Americans when they should be punishing China. It's not our fault we got the virus here. It's China's fault. How about we mandate China do something, like pay up? You can't enforce this. What -- who -- the mailman is going to tell you to put on a mask, the sheriff, the garbage collector? They have better things to do. And the homeless are exempt. The homeless now get special rights.

MCDOWELL: Oh no, it's called houseless.

WATTERS: Houseless.

MCDOWELL: The houseless is what it was.

WATTERS: So, houseless have special rights. And I have a house so I have to be punished. That doesn't make any sense. Or you know who else is exempt? Vocal performers. So, if I'm not wearing a mask, someone tells me to put it on. I'm just going to burst into song.

PERINO: But you are a vocal performer.

WATTERS: Sorry. I am. I am a vocal performance.

PERINO: You talk a lot.

WATTERS: I talk too much.

TARLOV: I agree. It's my turn.

MCDOWELL: And swimming, if you're swimming. So, I'm going to -- if I have to go to Oregon, I'm going to wear a big bowl of water around my neck.

TARLOV: It's not a great policy.

WATTERS: Thank you.

TARLOV: We're at a tipping point because there are enough angry liberals that this is not happening in big liberal states, like it's not happening in New York. De Blasio has come out and said, we're not going to go back to this. If private businesses want to say, when you're inside, please put on a mask. I've noticed everywhere that I go in now. If I'm walking in somewhere to pick up a diet coke, going into the bank, I put on a mask. Now, there's still one that's carried around in my bag.

But COVID is unfortunately here to stay. And we're going to be getting our boosters soon. And that's probably going to become a semi-annual or annual tradition and that's just life. We need to figure out what's going on with the kids, obviously, getting them back to school and keeping them safe, is the number one priority.

But when you say something like you're -- you know, you're just going for a walk, I'd like you to wear a mask, people are going to get really angry, even if they agree with your politics. And that can backfire especially when COVID will still probably be the top issue alongside the economy come 2022.

GUTFELD: You're right.

TARLOV: Thank you.

GUTFELD: I mean, COVID is -- COVID is probably going to be here forever. And we're going to end up doing booster shots. But we can't let this creeping authoritarianism continue because I'm watching people accept it. Like, they're accepting it. That's more frightening than the disease. I'm sorry. To watch -- to watch people just go OK, I'll just keep giving away my freedoms, you know, because I want to be nice. No.

PERINO: I'm not nice on that.

GUTFELD: I like the fact that you're not nice.

PERINO: No.

TARLOV: But people also know which was the right thing to do, because we've been bragging about it that if you're vaccinated, if you get it, you're not going to be that sick. You're not going to go to the hospital, you're not going to be in a vent. I know there are exceptions to every rule, but that's the message that should be spread. Get your shot.

MCDOWELL: But it's the pain and punishment from the government. That's what it is. There was a music festival in Oregon. It appeared to be like part of the reason that they're masking outdoors. Five of the 66 people who tested positive were vaccinated. There were 61 people who were unvaccinated.

PERINO: Right.

MCDOWELL: But everybody has got to wear a mask. Nope. You can shoved that where the sun doesn't shine.

MCDOWELL: Yes.

TARLOV: Well, it does in the summer.

GUTFELD: Sometimes.

MCDOWELL: Next, Tom Brady, putting spoiled brats everywhere on blast and slamming today's work ethics.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Focus.

TARLOV: Thank you. Starter NFL Quarterback Tom Brady speaking out against today's work ethic saying, "Life is about always changing and adapting to different things today. The world wants to blame and shame and guilt and fear everything all the time. We would never teach our kids that, you know. We would never say this is how we're going to get through life the best. You're going to blame everyone when things don't go right or I always get it my way, but you should never get it your way. It's not how to live a joyful life."

Dana, what do you think of Tom Brady's advice here?

PERINO: Well, I wrote the book. I'm glad that he's doing it because a lot of people admire him and follow him. And there's just -- there's no getting around the hard work if you want to succeed. There's just -- there's just not. And everyone is -- I'm always looking for a shortcut too. I get that. But there's just no substitute for actually putting in the work and he's living proof of it.

TARLOV: 100 percent I don't know if anyone else watched the last dance, the Michael Jordan documentary from last summer.

WATTERS: Yes. All right, so this is very similar to what Michael Jordan always talks about. And frankly, any athlete that succeeds at this level, right? Never blames anyone else. It's like, I should go back to the gym. I should work harder. What do you think?

MCDOWELL: Please don't compare Tom Brady to Michael Jordan. Michael Jordan is the king of all athletes of all time.

TARLOV: OK.

MCDOWELL: North Carolina -- North Carolinians love him. If we have to -- OK, so Tom Brady is right. If we have to talk about Mr. Perfect, can we at least show some video of him in some shorts?

TARLOV: I take just --

MCDOWELL: I mean he's just perfect. OK, you're right again. Go away. How about that?

TARLOV: Would you like to see Tom Brady in his shorts?

GUTFELD: Well, no. I've seen enough of that. It's good to see that he remembered the advice I gave him in the locker room all those years ago. We both -- of course -- you know, I don't think you guys are aware of this. We both went to the same high school. I've never -- I rarely bring it up. But no successful person ever says I got here by blaming other people.

PERINO: Yes.

GUTFELD: It's never happened. There are those who make a good living blaming others, but they aren't winners, they're on CNN.

WATTERS: Oh.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TARLOV: Wow. Jesse.

WATTERS: The only time I blame people is the producers.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Those are the ones that really should shoulder the blame. And China, you can't forget about China. That's the only two people that are acceptable to blame. But athletes fail a lot. And that's why they're so resilient. They're dropping balls, they're missing tackles, they're screwing up constantly. But they're overcoming that adversity and that's what makes elite athletes better. Tom gets that. And I mentioned that in How I Save the World which is still on sale where books are sold.

PERINO: Where are books sold?

WATTERS: Where are books sold anyway? Amazon?

TARLOV: All the places.

GUTFELD: Yes, all the places.

TARLOV: That developed quickly. "ONE MORE THING" is up next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WATTERS: Now, you're the one to talk.

GUTFELD: You know what, Jesse?

WATTERS: Get off your high horse.

GUTFELD: I can't get on a high horse. But go ahead, Jesse.

WATTERS: All right, Fox News "PRIMETIME" edition of mom texts.

PERINO: Oh.

WATTERS: Mom has not been happy this week. All right, number one, "Handsome and articulate and oh my goodness!! But please do not allow Trump on television and don't lose your ings. Love you proudly."

GUTFELD: That's interesting.

WATTERS: Number two, "Vax mandates are so important. Get a grip America." Number three, "Never use the word butt." I think that was in the prompter. Number four, "Are these your words or whose?" Number five, "Why is your language gotten so loose when this is an opportunity for you to communicate to so many? Why have you gone low brow trying too hard to be friendly?"

GUTFELD: Wow.

WATTERS: Please don't, Jesse. Last one, "Active verbs and in ING and I've yet to hear you going or getting or any of your usual speech. It's off. Your loving but critical mother."

GUTFELD: That is brutal.

WATTERS: Very critical.

GUTFELD: That's very critical.

WATTERS: All right, so tonight, mom, we have on primetime DeSantis, Eric Trump, Trey Gowdy, Dan Bongino, Tucker Carlson, not a Democrat in site. Take that, mom.

TARLOV: I was going to have to say, all these liberals on your show.

GUTFELD: That is a murderer's row.

WATTERS: And catch me at the LBI book swap the 31st of August. I'll be signing and, as I said, you can touch me.

GUTFELD: Yes. And you don't have to wear a mask.

WATTERS: Just not my eye, the elephant in the room. Yes,I have a little eye issue. I'm aware of it. We don't need you pointing it out on social media.

GUTFELD: Everybody pointed out. Dana?

PERINO: Mom, send us a text on it. OK, I want to talk about this guy. There's a New Jersey stop and shop, that's groceries. It helped a world war two veteran and former employee celebrate his 100th birthday. They gave him the parking spot reserved for U.S. veterans that will forever for the rest of his days bear his name.

His name is Bartholomeo -- excuse me -- "Benny" Ficeto. He's also known as Benny the Bagger. He served in the Army Air Force during World War II. He began work for stop and shop 12 years ago, guys, because he wanted to work. And everybody is saying him happy birthday. There's an all-girls acapella group singing from -- songs from his era and he deserved every great moment.

WATTERS: You know, if I had known that vets get preferred parking, I would have enlisted years ago.

GUTFELD: Oh, geez. Oh, here we go. You're a terrible person. I'm talking because I'm trying to look for my little notes here that are like -- anyway, so if you're a fan of metal, the late Riley Gale who was the lead singer of Power Trip passed away last year. They launched the Riley Gale Foundation. There it is.

If you go to rileygalefoundation.org, you can find ways to help the -- you know, the vulnerable, contribute to animal rescue, mental health initials, and it'll be administered by Gale's family. This was my "ONE MORE THING" last -- yesterday, but we got bumped. And I was going to tell you about kind of a -- it's like a party tonight that starts at 7:00 p.m. in Texas, Dallas, Texas at the Deep Ellum Art Company in Dallas to celebrate Gale's life.

So, you got like an hour to get there. But what is it -- what time is it now?

PERINO: No, it's only 5:00 there.

GUTFELD: It's only 5:00. So, you have two hours to get to Dallas. I think there's going to be some drinks. I don't know. I can't make it. But go to the Web site. It's a rileygalefoundation.org.

PERINO: Cool.

TARLOV: All right, so this was also my "ONE MORE THING" for yesterday but it's today. But you don't have to go anywhere. Just listen. Rolling Stones drummer Charlie Watts passed away yesterday. Widely regarded as one of the coolest men in rock. He always had the best clothes, the snappiest dresser, great suits. He was with the band nearly 60 years joining in '63.

Tributes poured in, obviously, from everywhere, all of his bandmates. The tributes from the living Beatles I thought were particularly incredible. He's just an amazing guy. He also had the Charlie Watts orchestra. He was a huge jazz enthusiast. Married 57 years. I got to see them perform in Hyde Park when I lived in London, which was one of the coolest experiences of my life. Mick Jagger actually went to the school of economics where I went for one year. He dropped out but they still say he's the most famous alum.

MCDOWELL: And you got to stare at Mick Jagger's butt for like 60 years right?

TARLOV: Not a bad life.

GUTFELD: How would you tell the difference between that and his face? Dagen, quickly?

WATTERS: Oh.

MCDOWELL: That's good point. Hey, a panda in the Smithsonian National Zoo celebrated a first birthday. There you go. Delicious. It was like an icy fruit cake made out of like grape juice and something.

PERINO: But did they give him the parking spot?

MCDOWELL: No.

GUTFELD: There you go. All right, that's it for us. "SPECIAL REPORT" is up next. Hey, Bret.

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