Don't Make the Same Mistake I Did

Dear Friends of "FOX & Friends,"

Welcome to another week of cablecasting, hope your weekend was mighty fine, and you're well rested, because it's time to say "Ready... set... SHOP!"

Today on our show we did some research on how many people will use the Internet to do their shopping. The number is HUGE! Friday is officially the first shopping day of the Christmas season.

Women are so good at getting their guys thoughtful practical stuff that we love. Meanwhile, many men struggle to figure out what to get their beloved wives and girlfriends. Please allow me guys to help you on your gift selection.

As you know, I've written a book that celebrates marriage; it's called "The Mr. and Mrs. Happy Handbook" (a New York Times Best Seller). It's a funny look at married life. In the book I address the issue of how many men, me included, suffer from something I call "gift fatigue." During three weeks in late spring, it's my wife's birthday, my anniversary, and Mother's Day. So I'm an expert at shopping.

Let me give you guys some advice: NEVER buy a woman an appliance. Unless Ralph Lauren makes a toaster oven, she won't want it. Why? Because an appliance may be shiny and new, but when a woman opens it, the subliminal message is "I love you honey, now go into the kitchen and make me a sandwich!"

Also, beware when purchasing clothing. One Christmas I bought my wife a winter coat. Of course a coat I believe should be big and bulky, but after she opened the box to the coat that was TEN SIZES too big, it was clear that she was steamed, and would not speak to me, except through the children, until Valentines Day.

"Kids tell your father Cupid's dead."

So now I'm much smarter about the whole sizes thing, and here's my advice: Whenever you buy a woman a piece of clothing, always buy SIZE SMALL. For openers she'll think to herself, "He thinks I'm a small! I love that guy..." Besides, men don't have great taste and she's going to take it back anyway and by the day after Christmas, she'll have something she really likes...at half price (something you'll like!).

For more information about "The Mr. and Mrs. Happy Handbook," which celebrates the pageantry of marriage, that starts with an "I do" and sometimes ends with a boiled rabbit, please visit www.happyhandbook.com. By the way, this is the best place to get an autographed copy, and here's the great part... if you purchase two... the book company will donate a third copy to a military family... just in time for Christmas! Give the gift of laughter!

Have a great day, and see you in the morning for "Fox and Friends."

Steve Doocy

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