An Open Letter From the Cowboy Libertarian to President Obama, Congress and the Mainstream Media

Dear Mr. President, Members of Congress, and the Mainstream Media,

Well, summer is now unofficially over and with Labor Day in the rearview mirror, it is “back to work” time. I hope all of you had swell vacations, in your case Mr. President, on high falutin’ Martha’s Vineyard. And in the case of some members of Congress on taxpayer paid junkets to exotic locales. Many Americans could not afford to take vacations and would love to get back to work as well but there are no jobs.

While you were gone, the economy sunk further -- as did all of your poll numbers.

A year from now you all will be in the final sprint to see if the American people are going to renew your contracts. And right now the way things look, come 2013 many of you might be looking for honest work as many of your countrymen are already doing.

You are getting all kinds of advice from the pundits, pollsters, political wizards and soothsayers. Most of who don’t know their elbow from a hot rock.

So for what it’s worth, here is my two cents worth of advice.

First, for you Mr. President.

Talk less and say more.

You talk too much. So much that no one knows what is important and what isn’t. And when you talk you don’t say anything. When you give an answer at a press conference you are so long winded that if I close my eyes I think I am listening to Joe Biden.
As the saying goes, if you’ve got nothing much to say, don’t take an hour to prove it.

Better to shoot your rifle off by mistake than your mouth on purpose.

And speaking of Biden, here is the advice you need to give that wind bag. 

If you want to get re-elected, tell him to shut up for the next 14 months or else those “barbarians at the gate” will kick it in and kick you out.

There is an old story that says, “There once was a woman who had two sons. One went to sea and the other became Vice President. And neither was heard from again.” You should be so lucky.

It don’t take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

You are not a regular guy so when you go out on the stump, especially rural areas, don’t drop your “Gs” trying to be one. The people aren’t as dumb as David Axelrod and those other Chicago whiz kids think they are.

They aren’t a bunch of bumpkins and they don’t wear bib overalls or walk around barefoot with a piece of straw dangling out of their mouths. They have the internet and cell phones and satellite radio in their pick-ups and combines! What is a combine you ask? Never mind.

One final thought for you Mr. President: The best way to eat crow is while it’s still warm. The colder it gets the harder it is to swallow.

It’s still early in the election cycle and you could recover from your low approval ratings. But in order to do that you will have to eat a little crow and admit that your big government ideas, green boondoggles and deficit spending didn’t work out so well.
My guess is that you won’t take this particular piece of advice since you and your campaign seem hell bent on showing the people you are being “tough” and are a “fighter” even though there is absolutely nothing in your background that says you ever fought for anything. And voting “present” for those years in the Illinois legislature is not being tough.

As for you Republicans in Congress? Dance with them who brung you.

You owe your majority to the Tea Party and like minded Americans who while they might not go to rallies agree with the Tea Party message. You do not owe your majority to the elitist establishment Republicans who live inside the Beltway and make their living offering their opinions on TV.

Nor do you owe it the legions of political consultants who think they are so dang smart but whose only skill is looking at your watch and telling you what time it is.

If the union members are Obama’s army, those SOBs in the Tea Party as Teamster President Jimmy Hoffa so lovingly called them are the foot soldiers in your army.

And finally to the mainstream media especially the folks in the newsroom of The New York Times and the TV studios of the alphabet networks ABC, CBS, NBC and its red-headed stepchild, MSNBC.

You need a new narrative not them talking points from the DNC you get in your e-mail inbox every morning.

And no matter what your skewed polls say, no one except you, diehard Obamatons and that same DNC believes that the Tea Party, which only surfaced in 2009, is responsible for decades of bipartisan government mismanagement and spendthrift policies.

But you reckon that if they throw enough mud at this group of patriotic Americans that it will scare folks from supporting their ideas and candidates.

If I were you I would be careful.

As the country slips into possibly another recession and struggles to gain solid economic footing, more folks are and will come around to thinking maybe the Tea Party is right.

My advice to those in the mainstream media who denigrate and deride the Tea Party -- and by extension the American people -- is simple.

When your head’s in the bear’s mouth it’s not the time to be smacking him on the nose and calling him names.

Two years ago that bear woke up from its hibernation and is mad as hell.

That bear is the people of this country who ain’t buying your cattle crap anymore.

They don’t like you and it is your head in the bear’s mouth.

So if I were you as the saying goes, I would not be smacking him on the nose and calling him names.

Or else those jaws might bite down…and hard.

Welcome back! Now get to work and be thankful that you have a job…at least for now.

Patrick Dorinson, aka "The Cowboy Libertarian."

Patrick Dorinson blogs at The Cowboy Libertarian. He can be heard on the radio program with the same name Sundays, from 3-5 p.m. PT on KFBK radio.