This is a rush transcript from "The Greg Gutfeld Show," February 20, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST: So, thanks to CNN, we learned a lot of new things about President Biden, A, he likes to build a fire in the Oval Office. B, he uses the fireplace. C, he often throws a log on otherwise known as a John Kerry. D, he likes to read the newspaper on a plane.

This is some crazy [bleep]. So what else will we hope to learn from our fearless press? That Joe puts his socks on one foot at a time, hopefully before he puts on his slippers?

But in all seriousness, this is a great strategy. The more boring Joe appears, the easier it is to slip in those radical policies. It's truly the opposite of Trump who commanded everyone's attention so he was always scrutinized.

But Joe, he just Joes along and the media just smiles and returns to their needlepoint. Next thing you know, you've got the expansion of the welfare state and trillions of dollars for cockamamie climate plans. Yes, I said cockamamie, bleep me.

But hey, everyone knows Joe likes kids better than people.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JOE BIDEN (D), PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: Everybody knows I like kids better than people.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Because as you know, kids aren't people. Meanwhile, The Lincoln Project says, you love kids more than people, hold my Capri Sun.

But I guess we did learn one thing after all, Joe still makes no damn sense. We saw that on Tuesday when CNN went to town with Grandpa Joe. Tell us Joe, was there nothing in the refrigerator?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BIDEN: There was nothing in the refrigerator figuratively and literally speaking.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Tell us more, Joe, about the grandchildren can use that online you know --

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BIDEN: You know, my grandchildren can use that -- that online, you know, make me look like I'm, you know, in the seventh century.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: How folksy. He is like Bill Cosby without the sweaters or the roofies. But finally China did come up in the conversation, giving Joe an opportunity to condemn their treatment of the Uighurs.

I wonder if culturally there are different norms that each country and their leaders are expected to follow.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BIDEN: Culturally, there are different norms in each country and their leaders are expected to follow.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Talk about true diversity, systemic torture, concentration camps. Yes, that sounds weird to our American ears, but I'm sure we do stuff that seems weird to them, like not having systemic torture and concentration camps.

But it's strange that Joe makes excuses for that stuff when only weeks ago, he called our immigration policies inexcusable. Why is that? Is it because it's easy? Because China's atrocities are balanced out by affordable basketball shoes?

Maybe it's me, but this China First America Last shtick is already getting kind of old.

And what of poor Press Secretary Jen Psaki, who said that schools could reopen if they hold only one day of in-person learning a week. Joe wouldn't dare throw her under the bus and call it a mistake in communication.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BIDEN: That was a mistake in the communication. The goal will be five days a week. Now it's going to be harder to open up the high schools.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Poor Jen, she only missed it by four days.

But I guess this is all part of the processes.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JEN PSAKI, WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETARY: It looks like there was a conflation of two ongoing processes, one that's through the courts and one that is through the CFIUS process that goes through the Department of Treasury.

There is a rigorous CFIUS process that is ongoing. I'm not going of course, not that you're expecting me to set a precedent of commenting on those reviews in process, but would just stress that they are distinct processes.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: That's a lot of processes. I wonder if that's your new favorite phrase.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Okay, $3.75, will that be cash or credit?

KATHERINE TIMPF, FOX NEWS CHANNEL CONTRIBUTOR, IMPERSONATING JEN PSAKI: Well, it's interesting, right? Because processing each of those processes is a different process of processes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Right? Well, the process here is you give me $3.75.

TIMPF: I'm not going to set a precedent of commenting on those processes, except to say that they are two distinct processes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I woke up this morning, my coffee pot, not working. Oh, I have to ask you, my brother's getting married in a month or so, and I wanted to take the day off, what's the process for that?

TIMPF: Oh, I'm so glad you brought up the process, because it's very important in any process for the processor --

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well, I was just supposed to --

TIMPF: Sorry, please don't interrupt the process of processing those processes.

I've got to call you back. My husband's on the phone. Hello.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Honey, oh my God, the roof is leaking. I got water flooding into the house. I need the number for the roofer right now.

TIMPF: Well, as I said before, President Biden does take climate change very seriously. That's why we have rejoined the Paris Climate Accords.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: No, you don't understand the water is pouring into the house right now.

TIMPF: I understand that there is a flooding process that is ongoing. I am processing that. I really think you just need to calm down and trust the processes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Oh, God.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: I guess you needed something to replace circling back. Of course, after Joe stumbled through the Town Hall, how did the media respond? Hmm, this sounds like a segue for a new thing we're calling --

ANNOUNCER: Fawn Stars.

GUTFELD: Yes. You know, the thing about Joe Biden is that he speaks in very human terms.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

DAVID AXELROD, CNN SENIOR POLITICAL COMMENTATOR: The thing about Joe Biden is he speaks in very human terms. And you know, these Town Halls are sort of, if he were an Olympian, this would be his gold medal event.

NIA-MALIKA HENDERSON, CNN SENIOR POLITICAL REPORTER: And classic Joe Biden, this is a forum that he has shined in because he's just a man of fundamental human decency.

POPPY HARLOW, CNN ANCHOR: Can you just weigh in, finally, Jim, on the humility? I mean, when he talked at the end of the town hall about like, I wake up in the White House, and I ask Jill, where are we? And I'm uncomfortable with them putting my suit jacket on and having all this help? I mean, what a -- what a breath of fresh air.

JIM MESSINA, CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER, MESSINA GROUP: Boy, it is true, Poppy, I teared up at that.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: He actually cried over that Town Hall. Don't let that wimp near the Hallmark Channel. He will explode.

But they're like kids excited over mom's new boyfriend. The other one was such a jerk. But this guy, he won't make you work too hard or say mean stuff to your face. But you get the point, as long as Joe speaks in human terms, he can lie about the vaccine, lie about the minimum wage and write off Hong Kong and the Uighurs as a mere difference in cultural priorities.

It's almost like Joe could say anything these days and get away with it. Right, Joe?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

ANNOUNCER: And now President Biden on his daily routine.

TOM SHILLUE, FOX NATION HOST, IMPERSONATING JOE BIDEN: I like a lot of things, didn't you read about it? I like fireplaces. I like sunsets. If you like pina coladas getting caught in the rain, I'm your man.

I'm not into health food. I am into champagne. If you like making love at midnight on the dunes of the cape, knock it off. You'll get VD. What's that? Sorry. COVID.

Summon the troops.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Nicely done. So it wasn't a great week for Joe, but it's hard to notice when no one really reports on it. As Joe brushes aside serious issues while enjoying the simple things of life like clouds and cottage cheese, the press will be there cataloging every moment and each one special moment will be the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Yes, sliced bread. Joe really likes sliced bread. He thinks he invented it. There's your next story CNN, I bet Chris Cuomo will report that hell out of it.

ANNOUNCER: Period.

GUTFELD: Let's welcome tonight's guest. He is so gorgeous, his dimples have abs and his abs have dimples. "FOX and Friends" Weekend co-host and host of "Untold Patriots Revealed." What a title, premiering Monday on FOX Nation, Pete Hegseth.

Well, she is so bright, chandeliers send her hate mail. FOX News Headlines 24/7 reporter, Carley Shimkus.

And she is so sharp a bed of nails sleeps on her, host of "Sincerely, Kat" on FOX Nation, Kat Timpf.

And the only thing bigger than his biceps is his heart. My massive sidekick and host of "Nuff Said" on FOX Nation, Tyrus.

Yes, I turned it around.

GEORGE "TYRUS" MURDOCH, FOX NEWS CHANNEL CONTRIBUTOR: Yes.

TIMPF: That was so sweet.

GUTFELD: It was sweet, you know, because I missed him on Valentine's Day. So you know, I thought I would open that.

You want me to go to you first, Tyrus, Do you agree that Joe Biden is the sneakiest old white man on the planet?

MURDOCH: Is he -- I mean, naturally when -- I'm glad you came to me as an expert. I've been studying old white men for about five years right now. I've come to some observation. They are all clever tricksters.

And when they don't know, they really know. And I think what's happening right now is Joe is having a bit of fun of us. He can fall asleep in a meeting. He can say whatever he wants, and we all say oh, it's so cute.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: It's great. Forget the fact that he is the President of the United States and maybe, you should know, saying like the refrigerator was full or not full or what have you and saying things like, my kids know that internet. The internet is not a person, place or thing. It's -- is it a thing?

GUTFELD: I don't know what it is.

MURDOCH: Is it a thing?

TIMPF: It's a way of life.

MURDOCH: I confuse myself. I'm still caught up in the whole processes -- you get dumbed down by the dumbness.

GUTFELD: It's infectious.

MURDOCH: It will get you -- we are all dumber.

GUTFELD: It's infectious. The way, Pete, the way Trump made us all like Trumpy, Biden is making this all Bideny.

PETE HEGSETH, FOX NEWS CHANNEL HOST: Bideny -- I am surprised the one clip you didn't play was him wandering around with Jill, maybe you used it last week with all the hearts on Valentine's Day.

GUTFELD: Well, I cried.

HEGSETH: It was brilliant, right?

GUTFELD: I was like that dude.

HEGSETH: In sort of --

GUTFELD: I wept.

HEGSETH: You wept?

GUTFELD: Yes. What did you make of the Town Hall?

HEGSETH: Jesus wept is my favorite verse in the Bible, the shortest one also.

GUTFELD: There you go.

HEGSETH: What did I make of the Town Hall? Lowest hanging fruit possible, softball questions, very easy.

GUTFELD: Yes.

HEGSETH: And even the positive accounts of the Town Hall said, Joe Biden, who gave up often meandering answers.

TIMPF: Yes.

HEGSETH: Like they couldn't -- they can't say negative things. They just have to say, sometimes a little long-winded and a little meandering, sort of lost, you know, where am I? They'll never admit that. They'll cover for him completely, and we're all used to it.

We know -- we're sedated for the next four years. We know that's exactly what we're getting.

GUTFELD: You know, Carley, I bet you like the day-to-day info.

CARLEY SHIMKUS, FOX NEWS HEADLINES 24/7 REPORTER: Well, you know, to be honest, I do like to learn little details about important people. But I think the thing that made this particular CNN article about the fireplace and the bed time and the Valentine's Day greeting that Jill Biden wrote near a window sill in the West Wing in 2009, all those little -- they are a little nauseating.

It is because the media is so bias, you can see the political perspective and, you know, President -- former President Trump and the media were like oil and water, but even when he tried to do good things, they would criticize him.

Like during the partial government shutdown when I think it was Clemson won the National Championship, and he had them over and then he had fast food kept in. There were some articles that called that racist and classist.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: It was grandfather-ish.

SHIMKUS: I thought it was a very nice thing. It was fun and if you ask any of those players, they loved it.

HEGSETH: They loved it. Yes.

SHIMKUS: But you brought up a very good point in the intro when you said you have to watch out, because when the media stops taking politics, when they stop reporting on politicians seriously, politicians start feeling like they can get away with things.

Look at what's going on with Andrew Cuomo right now.

GUTFELD: Yes, I stole that point from Kennedy. You know, Kat, it's true. You know, the more boring big government becomes, and the more dangerous it is because you just stop caring.

TIMPF: Yes, absolutely. I think a great example too is remember, everyone was lauding that beautiful moment when he was being so nice and sweet to the child that asked that question, saying, oh it's very rare for kids to get really sick with coronavirus. They don't really --

Everyone was like, well, beautiful, but when Trump said those things like he is spreading lies and misinformation. How dare he say -- it's like nobody -- I never heard anybody say that. I never heard anyone brought that up.

It is like always so not -- but if you just took the exact same text, exact same words and had Trump say that it would have been a wall to wall scandal all day on these networks.

SHIMKUS: And look what's going on in schools? You play that and then, look schools are still --

TIMPF: Why are they not -- nobody pressed him.

HEGSETH: There's never that connection.

TIMPF: Then why aren't the schools open then, Joe? Nobody even thought about how little sense that makes because they are already just looking at through this lens of this is the best guy ever. Look at him in his wife and how cute they are.

I do not care. This is crazy.

GUTFELD: It sounds like a cliche, but you could do a whole TV show every week called "What if it were Trump?" Just like you could just show this thing what if it were Trump? You know, making no sense at all, saying that there were no vaccines, you know, lying about the minimum wage inflated numbers. It's crazy.

All right, we've got to go. Also giving China a pass.

All right, Cuomo's mess just keeps getting messier.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: You can put a fork in New York. This week, New York Mayor Bill de Blasio announced he is bringing live performances back to the city as part of something called Open Culture Program as restaurants go out of business and crime soars. Here's the mayor's priority announcement.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

MAYOR BILL DE BLASIO (D), NEW YORK CITY: We need a recovery that brings back the life and the heart and the energy of the city and that everyone gets to be a part of and we're going to do that.

We're going to really bring back the heart and soul in New York City. We need arts and culture back and we need people to see it and feel it to participate in it.

Our cultural communities, our conscience, our cultural community is our hope and our identity as New Yorkers.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Wait, you're telling me the pandemic is keeping that off the street? You think maybe we're giving the pandemic a bad rap? I joke. It's terrible that pandemic.

But you know who deserves his bad rap? Yes, this fella.

The F.B.I. has opened an investigation into Governor Cuomo is covering up nursing home COVID deaths. And this week New York State Assemblyman Ron Kim says Cuomo threatened to quote "destroy him" if he didn't help Cuomo contain the damage.

But who needs fellow Dems when CNN has got your back? The network says they've reinstated a ban on Chris Cuomo covering his brother, the Governor. Funny they didn't do that when it was good news coming out of bad Andy.

Anyway, here's a better choice for the Governor of New York.

[VIDEO CLIP PLAYS]

GUTFELD: I never -- Pete, I never get tired of looking at that. I've had that video on 24/7 since 2009. I don't know why.

HEGSETH: That's normal.

GUTFELD: What would you like to comment on? De Blasio's magical video? Cuomo or the fact that Cuomo is giving cover to de Blasio who is terrible but because Cuomo is worse, de Blasio is getting away with it?

HEGSETH: De Blasio is a Marxist socialist who has crushed New York City, yet somehow Cuomo walked into this. It is the arrogance of Cuomo that got him, right, writing a book in the middle of it. I've set the example. Oh my goodness, made a huge mistake ordering these people in. Now, I've got a cover up because there's an investigation.

It's coming for him and now if you've got Comrade Cortez on top of it, it's even worse, but that video --

GUTFELD: Yes.

HEGSETH: You too can dance in the middle of the street. Surrounded by snow piles with masks on and that is how we will recapture New York.

TIMPF: I thought the video was crazy, it is like, I agree, New York is missing our arts and our cultures but that video does not represent art. That video is like what I look like after I leave the bar after having five tequila sodas, which I also miss to be able to do.

HEGSETH: That's true.

GUTFELD: You know what that is, though? It's a reminder that the only people who appreciate that kind of dance are the type of people who engage in that kind of dance. Right? That is a -- that's kind of more of the internal community, not the external audience.

That's about -- he is like almost talking to the dancers and not to the people who watch it.

SHIMKUS: I think -- I'm sure that's really hard to do. I mean, they're much more limber than I am.

GUTFELD: I think you could it.

SHIMKUS: They did it all together. They didn't all together.

HEGSETH: Yes, you could do it.

SHIMKUS: Thank you for thinking that.

HEGSETH: I said Tyrus not Carley.

SHIMKUS: Do you think I could do it? No. But I think -- I think it's just the music behind it and the fact that de Blasio could make anything less cool.

GUTFELD: That's true. That's true.

SHIMKUS: Like his voice set to the -- it was bad.

GUTFELD: Yes, he's like -- he is basically, you don't want Lurch endorsing any of your stuff.

Tyrus, I am -- the CNN thing. Banning Chris from interviewing his brother has got to be one of the most idiotic stories of all. They milked that sibling rivalry for so long talking about his dating habits. And now when all [bleep] hits the fan.

MURDOCH: Yes, let's get after it. No, no, no.

GUTFELD: Let's not get after it.

MURDOCH: Let's not get after it. Because are you saying that he is not fair and impartial?

GUTFELD: True.

MURDOCH: Because he is described as an anchorman, so would it really matter?

TIMPF: That's the thing.

MURDOCH: Would it really matter as an anchor, if it's your -- you would know if he is lying faster because of your relationship, but you believe you'd say, I mean, you'd be proving a point as a strong journalist, that even though those guy's family, I'm going to get to the truth. And the truth is, so how's you're dating life?

Like, why don't you come home for dinner? Why does mom get to live with you? Like, that's not what the American people want. I mean, that's basically the gist of their conversation.

But if I could just -- and I don't know if you guys are aware of this, but in 2014, I won a Slammy in the WWE for dancer of the year.

GUTFELD: No, I did not know.

TIMPF: Congratulations.

SHIMKUS: We have a floor. Hello?

MURDOCH: It was the whole -- no, I'm retired from dancing. But here's the thing, that type of dancing is very popular with a certain sect in our community, a cultural group, my six-year-old daughter and her friends and my nine-year-old, they all dance and clean around the house and one -- and do moves and I have to like carry on like I've done many interviews, while I have dancing in the background while they're doing moves.

TIMPF: That's true.

MURDOCH: And they're showing their stuff. They even tried to say, "Dad were dance fighting," and I sent them to their rooms because I'm not -- there is no such thing as dance fighting. Because it doesn't really happen. You can do all the pop, locks and flip. It's a punch.

But that's the world we live in now, its fantasy world for little kids times, because dancing makes it all better. If you watch any new kid show, it was like there's this big issue between the pony and the unicorn, but somehow --

GUTFELD: It's solved?

MURDOCH: Solve with a dance.

GUTFELD: You know, it's just like "West Side Story."

MURDOCH: Yes. Yes.

GUTFELD: I solve everything by dancing, Pete.

HEGSETH: That's smart. I've seen "Stepbrothers." I see a microphone. I see a singer, I see a drum set. I see a drummer, I see a Slammy winter and I see a dance floor right here.

SHIMKUS: Yes.

HEGSETH: And I think Tyrus, now, is your time.

MURDOCH: Yes, but all you need to see is seven figures, and I am in it.

HEGSETH: Bring New York City back.

GUTFELD: Yes. All right. All right. I'm still -- the take home message here is that de Blasio is factually worse than Cuomo. But Cuomo has made a national debacle.

TIMPF: It is bad that we're here in New York saying, yes, well, this one is -- they are both really awful.

GUTFELD: But that guy ran for President and he is destroying the city, but we're so focused on Cuomo because of what he's done. It's like -- it is not fair.

TIMPF: No.

GUTFELD: Two bad things should have happened separately. I don't even know if that makes sense.

HEGSETH: It doesn't.

GUTFELD: It doesn't. Up next, we unveil our first heroes in media.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

ASHLEY STROHMIER, FOX NEWS CHANNEL CORRESPONDENT: Live from "America's News Headquarters," I'm Ashley Strohmier. A terrifying close call for a Colorado suburb after a Hawaii-bound United Airlines flight experienced engine failure. The plane scattered debris including large metal parts across several neighborhoods in Broomfield. It landed safely at Denver International Airport.

No injuries were reported, but some property damage was happening and anyone finding debris from the plane is advised not to move it or touch it. Federal investigators are on the scene.

Also three people are dead and two others are hurt after a shooting at a New Orleans area gun store. Investigators said gunfire erupted after an argument between the suspect and an employee. The suspect who died at the scene reportedly entered the store with a fully loaded un-holstered gun.

The two injured people were taken to the hospital and are stable.

I'm Ashley Strohmier. Now back to THE GREG GUTFELD SHOW. For all your headlines log on to foxnews.com.

GUTFELD: In a profession full of zeros, it's time to note the heroes in a new segment we're calling --

ANNOUNCER: Heroes in media.

GUTFELD: Our first hero, MSNBC's Joe Scarborough on the left there, slamming the idiots on cable news channels for comparing the destruction at the Capitol in January to the destruction from riots over the summer.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JOE SCARBOROUGH, MSNBC HOST: Because I know there are idiots on other cable news channels that will say, well, you know, this mom and pop store was vandalized during the summer riots and that's just as bad as the United States Capitol being vandalized.

No, no, actually, no. No, jackass, it's not.

I'm not going to confuse a taco stand with the United States Capitol. I'm not going to confuse the selling of tacos with actually moving through a constitutional process.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: The selling of tacos. What a tomato face turd whistle. The truth is, of course, the riots resulted in more than 20 deaths, as well as property damage estimated into the billions making it the most expensive period of unrest in our nation's recorded history. That's some taco stand, you sunbaked whitehead.

I think I could speak for Planet Earth when I say [bleep] you Joe Scarborough.

Our runner up, Nicolle Wallace moaning in delight over a Trump casino implosion.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

NICOLLE WALLACE, MSNBC HOST: And I feel a little -- well, I don't feel bad playing it. Let me play this. This is the implosion of a Trump property.

There it goes. Set a metaphor, Tim, are we done? This is Trump -- this is Trump and we've already ushered in -- are we done? Is it imploding?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I am just bathing in this for a second, Nicolle. Just let me enjoy it.

WALLACE: Right. Can we play it again? I never -- I never say stuff like this, but control room, can we play it again?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Play it again. Control room, play it again. It's weird how she claims she is so over someone, yet, she still can't let go. Reminds me of when I got dumped in high school. Oh, I'm so over her I'd say while poking pins in the voodoo doll I made from cat hair and her discarded clothing.

And that's our --

ANNOUNCER: Heroes in media.

GUTFELD: Carley, if you or me dismiss the suffering of minority businesses as a taco stand, we would have our --

SHIMKUS: We are racists.

GUTFELD: Yes, we would be -- and also, we'd be on the streets, we'd be out.

SHIMKUS: Yes, you know, I think this really shows the difference between Republicans and Democrats in terms of responses where Republicans from the very beginning, condemned the riots on Capitol Hill. Democrats still refuse to acknowledge the fact that the riots over the summer took place.

Right before the presidential election, I did a man-on-the-street interview and I was talking to New Yorkers about how they're going to vote and all of that. And I brought up the protests and the riots and one woman looked at me with utter disgust and said that never happened.

GUTFELD: Yes.

SHIMKUS: She is a New Yorker. This happened in her own backyard.

GUTFELD: Right.

SHIMKUS: And it was hundreds of -- but if you watch Joe Scarborough's show, which she wasn't watching FOX News, you wouldn't know that ever happened.

GUTFELD: Yes, even when they had reporters standing in front of torched buildings, they were like, mostly peaceful. There were 150 buildings in Minneapolis alone that were destroyed, $500 billion in damage, Kat, and two deaths in Minneapolis alone.

But he's on TV, and he could just say that. I'm honestly -- how far removed from reality do you have to be to say something like that?

TIMPF: Well, either that or it's calculated hypocrisy and trying to change the narrative, right? Because again, like Carley said, their whole thing is like, what happened on January 6, disgusting, wrong. I said that, Greg said that. You said -- we've all -- we've said that.

But his whole point is that people are downplaying. I would agree that downplaying what happened on January 6 would be an awful thing to do.

But when you're going to say that the most, you know, most destruction, most -- highest insurance claims because so much was destroyed in you know, recorded history was a couple of food stands were vandalized, you've lost all credibility at that point.

Because a simple Google search would show it's not like this is hidden information. And I had to pour over Excel spreadsheets to figure that out.

It's pretty obvious. I think it is, you know, much more malicious than that because I don't know how -- I was in New York when that happened. We couldn't -- we were trying to walk the dog and we couldn't go anywhere because there is broken glass everywhere.

Everybody knows what happened if you were actually in a city at that point.

GUTFELD: Yes.

SHIMKUS: It doesn't fit the narrative though.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: No. Exactly.

GUTFELD: Tyrus, I used to think that Chris Cuomo was the dumbest person on TV, and I've been proven wrong and I need to apologize, because Joe Scarborough is the dumbest person on TV.

MURDOCH: Well, Greg, what we have here is just a simple misunderstanding. You're not an elitist, not a know it all. And you don't say taco with three C's.

GUTFELD: What is that?

MURDOCH: So that to me, I feel when someone says, would you like a taco, I should be allowed to beat the holy living [bleep] out of them for just being a jackass.

This is reverse ray. I always talk about it. It's the most annoying, the right always gets the Confederate flag bearing, you know, honest work for a day's beating racist, and the left gets this, and this is 10 times more a taco stand. It is not the same as my beloved Capitol.

You weren't involved in either one. Both are individually horrible.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: To groups of people, even the building that they were falling over falling down, that's at least 5,000 people who lost a job from that, careers, neighborhoods impact.

TIMPF: Yes.

MURDOCH: But let's cheer on a guy who literally will be completely unaffected.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: President Trump is not like, the building went down. What are our numbers at? Don, Jr., quick, the number? Call the stock -- no. He's moved on.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: But this guy -- tacos

GUTFELD: It's him saying that word --

MURDOCH: Because that is like --

HEGSETH: Oh yes.

MURDOCH: I'm white. I'm using the nomenclature of tacos just to let you guys know that I get it.

TIMPF: He is doing the exact thing. He is saying people on the right of you.

MURDOCH: I'm not a Mexican Latino-American.

HEGSETH: He can do that. Greg Gutfeld cannot.

MURDOCH: And here's the deal, he shouldn't.

GUTFELD: I don't want to do it. Yes, I don't want to do it.

HEGSETH: Of course, he shouldn't.

MURDOCH: He shouldn't. I wouldn't be on the show if he was like, Tyrus, did you have watermelons this morning? I'd be like, catch this chair. But that's acceptable.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: It's funny, but it's sad because that's the story people are getting. Nothing happened. Everything bad is on the right. Everything good is on the left.

GUTFELD: And no fallout.

HEGSETH: There won't be fallout. You know, first of all, Nicolle Wallace says, have you ever called for something to the control room like, hey, control room, run that again.

Like, she doesn't even know the names of her producers, probably because she is too busy not knowing that type of thing. But also, you know, Joe Scarborough will never -- they are so wrapped in the emotion of the narrative.

GUTFELD: Right.

HEGSETH: And we all have our sense of January 6th. He'll never report that Officer Sicknick was not killed with a fire extinguisher.

GUTFELD: Yes, I know.

HEGSETH: He'll never do it. He'll never do -- that was a lie that was told from the beginning about Trump supporters bashing in the head of the police officer, which was proved to be completely untrue. It could have been proved months ago -- a month ago. He'll never talk about it because it doesn't fit his view.

Instead, he'll demean people and get away with it. He won your award, the first annual award.

GUTFELD: Yes. And I don't know who's going to top him, but I was -- I mean, is David Dorn a taco stand? The retired police.

HEGSETH: Exactly.

GUTFELD: The chief who was killed in St. Louis. All right, I've got to calm down. Still to come, this is supposed to be fun. Who got canceled this week? Oh, we've got a list.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Even toothpaste thinks he's a waste. This week, "Bachelor" host, Chris Harrison is stepping aside from his hosting duties after defending a contestant which he came under fire for attending a plantation themed frat party.

But now, even Crest says they're reconsidering working with Chris, odd coming from a brand whose entire purpose is to whiten things.

In an interview, Harrison spoke out against cancel culture but essence effusively apologized, it was painful, like it matters.

Meanwhile, the cancel saga of Gina Carano continues with the cowards at Hasbro announcing they will no longer make action figures of her "Star Wars" character from "The Mandalorian."

And finally, woke teachers are now going after William Shakespeare over claims that his works promote misogyny, racism and homophobia, among many other things. Nothing makes the woke-ademics feel more alive than canceling a guy who has been dead for 400 years.

Why, I'm producing my own version of "Romeo and Juliet," here are my actors rehearsing the balcony scene.

[VIDEO CLIP PLAYS]

GUTFELD: Yes, we did 800 takes. All right, Kat, I maintain that Shakespeare is overrated.

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: And I read all of his plays.

HEGSETH: Really?

GUTFELD: Yes, I do. But are you a pro cancel Shakespeare?

TIMPF: Here's the thing. I just -- it makes my head explode. Right? Because they're like, there's some misogyny in there, like no, [bleep], it was like 1500s and 1600s.

Like, if you're a woman, you had to have your main focus being a housewife. And if you said you didn't like that, you risk being exiled or maybe even labeled a witch.

GUTFELD: There were no houses. It was a castle wife.

TIMPF: Yes, whatever. Whatever. Obviously, there is obviously going to be something like misogynistic themes in there, obviously. But the thing is, we're in the present and we get to the present from the past and understand how we got to the present, you need to study what happened in the past.

And also, I don't think in general, anyone should be looking at Shakespeare plays as some sort of, you know, example of how to live. Like hey, maybe don't kill yourself over some dude or some girl you've known for four days, right?

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly.

TIMPF: Like that's not romantic.

GUTFELD: "Romeo and Juliet" has led to more teen suicides. This is totally in my head -- than anything.

TIMPF: I don't know why people think like that's such a cute relationship. That is like a cocktail of codependency and severe mental illness. They've known each other for four days.

GUTFELD: Yes. Yes, yes. And it was like so romanticized. And then Leo DiCaprio makes the movie and chases the end to a plus, which really offended me.

Pete, I'm going to you on this because you are our GI Joe. Hasbro, you know had created GI Joe, and now they're like pulling this warrior woman, probably one of the toughest women on Earth.

HEGSETH: A legitimately tough woman who fought and knows how to fight.

GUTFELD: Yes.

HEGSETH: First of all, my son did play a lead role in "Taming of the Shrew." William Shakespeare. Very inappropriate.

GUTFELD: But the shrew is a female, that's the --

HEGSETH: Yes, I had to look it up, yes, but you know, you work past it, you work through it. The only thing you need to learn in these moments is you can't apologize -- look, if someone --

GUTFELD: His apology was so over the top.

HEGSETH: You can't, I mean, if a guy like him can be canceled for what he's gone through, what he manages, what he deals with, and what makes one comment defending a cast member because he's showing grace and forgiveness and recognition that people make mistakes in their past life. And then you fawn and then you're done.

And for -- and "The Mandalorian" case, you can't have a political opinion outside one set of left-wing views and you're done and it's been a pile on for her.

GUTFELD: All right, Carley, I was going to go to you and ask you about "The Bachelor." But that would have been sexist to assume that's what you'd want to talk about.

SHIMKUS: You know, I've never watched "The Bachelor" at all. No, I don't understand it.

GUTFELD: See that was my own stereotype.

SHIMKUS: So here --

HEGSETH: I did.

SHIMKUS: That's okay.

TIMPF: I wish you wish --

SHIMKUS: That's okay. And you know what, I've got to be honest, not offended.

GUTFELD: Yes.

SHIMKUS: And that's how everybody should be. But I totally agree with you, Pete. You cannot apologize when you don't do something wrong. And the main point that he was trying to make is don't ruin this cast member's life over something that she did that was wrong in college, and then he got canceled for that as well.

And then a tooth -- Procter and Gamble is now saying that they are so disappointed in him for what he is saying.

GUTFELD: It's cancellation by extension.

SHIMKUS: That's because Hollywood and the media that -- the current setup has all the power now. The only way to cancel, cancel culture is if there's a legitimate competitor.

Now, Gina Carano is going to be working on --

GUTFELD: "The Daily Wire."

SHIMKUS: "The Daily Wire" and that's what they're trying to do. It's going to take -- it's a longshot bid to try and you know, to try and do something like that, but I think it's a good idea.

GUTFELD: Yes, you point -- I mean, when you think about Crest and Hasbro, it's the cowards incorporations.

SHIMKUS: Procter & Gamble.

GUTFELD: Procter & Gamble that just didn't -- they don't want to. It's just easier just to get rid of you.

HEGSETH: Yes.

GUTFELD: Just get rid of you.

MURDOCH: You know, again, you guys probably didn't know this, but I won back-to-back Shakespeare awards. One-two Shakespeare contest "Taming of the Shrew" and "Othello." It's a real deal. Yes. Not just football and basketball. Yes. I'm not here because of my looks.

But let me scoach, but the point is, Shakespeare is about the human condition and you're an idiot if you don't see that. I learned about a black man being a General married to a white woman running a whole military and having the respect of Kings from Shakespeare. That's what "Othello" was.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: He was betrayed, not because the color of his skin because of his power and his best friend wanted what he had.

GUTFELD: Yes. Iago. It's all about envy.

MURDOCH: And the best part of that story was at the end, they're dying face-to-face, and he asked him why and he says, you know, you'll never going to know, and that to me translated, you don't always get to know why people do bad things to you.

That lesson I've yet to see that on "90-Day Fiance."

HEGSETH: This is a really deep good stuff.

MURDOCH: So until -- you [bleep] with the wrong one. You don't [bleep] with my Shakespeare, now, I'm cussing but you started that party.

You learn more about yourself in his stories, even "Hamilton" or "Hamlet," and you look at "Macbeth" about being a coward and his wife telling him to do it, but then she didn't have the stomach for it.

Every scenario, even "Taming of the Shrew," yes, he was this robust know it all and that, but he humbled himself at the end, because her love and her respect was more important than his manhood than being the macho man.

In the beginning, of course, they were both -- she was a spinster. He was a jackass, and then ended up being a happy couple, but you go through that with him and you learn about life. That's what Shakespeare -- we don't even know who wrote Shakespeare. Shakespeare, because he was persecuted a time there was rumors that it is a group. It was a group of artists that got together and they had the best stuff.

GUTFELD: Joy Behar.

MURDOCH: Yes. So I mean, you cancel that, go ahead. What's the alternative?

GUTFELD: All right. You don't get that kind of conversation in "The View."

All right, up next, how much would you pay to spend a night at Buffalo Bill's? I'd give my left foot and they'd probably take it.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: They're selling thrills at Buffalo Bill's. The house where the famous villain from "Silence of the Lambs" turned his victims into clothing is a real place and you'll soon be able to spend the night there, Pete.

The Pennsylvania home is being renovated into a bed and breakfast. The new owner even plans to include movie accurate decor like the creepy well in the basement, which oddly looks like my master bedroom.

Regular bookings won't begin for a few months but anyone with a thick skin or any skin for that matter can enter now for a chance to sleep there.

No word if you have to supply your own lotion, but I hear the food is included in the price and I'm really looking forward to their lunch special. It is Sam Chowder, basically clam chowder, but with Sam.

All right, would you spend a night there, Pete?

HEGSETH: Sure.

GUTFELD: All right.

HEGSETH: Yes. I'd try it one time, if you come with me.

GUTFELD: I should have said coming along.

HEGSETH: Come with me. I was asked for a photo of the house I would stay in and mine is not "Silence of the Lambs." It's "Field of Dreams."

GUTFELD: Ah.

HEGSETH: You know the house.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes.

HEGSETH: It's off the field -- the corn field. I don't know if you have the phone, but that's where I would stay. That's what I would buy.

TIMPF: I picked a house from the 1994 smash hit "Richie Rich."

GUTFELD: Really?

TIMPF: Yes, I had such a crush on Macaulay Culkin when I was growing up. I still think he's pretty hot. But I think it's probably because we look so much alike, but --

MURDOCH: I never thought of it until now.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Oh, yes.

HEGSETH: I see it. I see it.

GUTFELD: That's a little Kat Timpf.

TIMPF: Yes, but I don't get them like wanting -- I don't know like sleeping --

GUTFELD: That lady was in "Redeye."

TIMPF: A fake murder house. I don't know. Because there's -- the ghosts is what makes sleeping in a murder house scary.

GUTFELD: Right.

TIMPF: But the ghosts? I don't know if ghosts are real or not. But if they are, they're probably of real dead people.

GUTFELD: Yes.

SHIMKUS: Yes.

GUTFELD: Yes, I don't know. How about you, Tyrus, any house you would like to see --

MURDOCH: I submitted the "Legends of the Fall" house from -- and of course, you know, I don't get the picture. You know what, I'm so -- oh, there it is. But, yes, it's Montana.

HEGSETH: That's cool.

MURDOCH: Living in the middle of nowhere is awesome. But again, if I'm going to stay in a haunted house, it's going to actually be a real haunted house. Unless, you can keep some stagehands on to queue the butterflies to fly at you.

I mean, there was literally not much to the house. He opened -- oh, big fat person, come in. I mean, that was it. He was at the front door of the house.

GUTFELD: And he wouldn't close his robe which was offensive.

By the way, I'm changing mine. Not the "Brady Bunch." Ben's lair in "Blue Velvet." Do you remember the place where Frank Booth goes to meet his buddy, Ben with the hookers and they do --

MURDOCH: Don't look at me.

GUTFELD: Don't look at me.

MURDOCH: Don't look at me.

GUTFELD: That's where I want to hang out, Carley, how about you?

SHIMKUS: I picked three. So I don't know. I rarely do this, but I'm going to talk to the control room real quick.

GUTFELD: Control room.

SHIMKUS: I don't know which one they -- I picked, okay. Thank you, control room. Downton Abbey. I mean, hello?

GUTFELD: It's good to be drafty. Very drafty.

SHIMKUS: And also, something that I didn't recognize when I was a child, but the "Home Alone" house is beautiful.

TIMPF: Macaulay Culkin.

SHIMKUS: Yes.

TIMPF: Do you find him attractive now? He was a hottie.

GUTFELD: You're so thirty.

TIMPF: Not my fault.

HEGSETH: Have you seen him lately?

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: All right. All right.

SHIMKUS: That Macaulay Culkin, well --

GUTFELD: She is right here. Kat Timpf.

HEGSETH: Sorry.

GUTFELD: All right. Final Thoughts up next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

ANNOUNCER: Final Thoughts. It's the last thought. That's why it's called the final thoughts, okay.

GUTFELD: All right. I'll go first. Rush Limbaugh, rest in peace. Without you, this show might not exist.

All right, Pete, what have you got?

HEGSETH: That's not hyperbole. That's true. God bless him. On FOX Nation this week, new series, it's called "Untold: Patriots Revealed" the stories of the founding. You've never heard of "Untold" stories.

GUTFELD: Those three words together.

HEGSETH: "Untold: Patriots Revealed." John Glover, guys like John Glover who saved George Washington three times in the Revolution.

GUTFELD: Yes.

HEGSETH: And I took part, there I am.

GUTFELD: All right, Kat, you have --

TIMPF: Quickly, today is a very special day because my dad was born on this day. Happy Birthday, Dad Timpf.

SHIMKUS: Happy Birthday, Dad Timpf.

GUTFELD: That's it for us. Special thanks to Pete, Carley, Kat, Tyrus.

I'm Greg Gutfeld and I love you, America.

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