Gutfeld: What the news denies is where the truth lies

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Gutfeld: What the news denies is where the truth lies

'Gutfeld!' panel debate whether they would step in on Miami airport brawl

This is a rush transcript from "Gutfeld!," April 27, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST: Sounds good. Does anybody have Hunter's number?

You know, every morning I try to find a story that gets me out of bed. Something that shouts, Gutfeld take off the handcuffs, put down the Cool Whip right about this. So, I try to look for stuff that other media giants ignore and I try not to wake up Jesse. I like what the news denies because that is where the truth lies. Take this brawl at the Miami International Airport. It's simply amazing.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hey, hey, hey, stop. (INAUDIBLE)

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Wouldn't hurt to hold your phone horizontally, Coppola? Of course, it's all on video. And like a rash I got on spring break. It's gone viral. It's already beaten the Oscars in the ratings, which is like beating Ted Bundy in friend requests. Kind of easy. It happened on Concourse D, Gate 12. I say it's a stone's throw from Starbucks. But I don't condone violence. Apparently and allegedly, which will be popular children's names next year.

Passengers were waiting for their Chicago flight when one group was told there were just three standby seats and they were a party of four. Obviously, that first mistake flying to Chicago.

Unless you're a drug mule with three pounds of coke in your anus, you won't stand a chance. Where it always gets a laugh, Rob. An argument -- an argument developed with the agent who then asked another group that they'd like to fly instead of the four who didn't want to split up.

Naturally, that led to both groups exchanging pleasantries. But what began as a measured mutually respectful given take degenerated into a more impassioned exchange as conflicting points of view were presented and in some cases rejected.

And like an anticop speech at the Oscars, it just keeps going and going. It's like being on hold with American Airlines. If this is happening before you board, how are they going to share an armrest?

On the bright side, usually, you have to wait until you're at baggage claim for something like this. Not that these are real fighters, they look like they escaped from a 90s repeated, The Jerry Springer show.

It's fun to watch but then like after eating the Spirit Airlines clam plate, you feel really sick. And you think maybe this is it. Is this kind of -- if this is the kind of thing that can happen in an airport especially during pre-boarding with children traveling alone, and adults who need a little more time are invited to board, why are we surprised when it happens in our streets?

This is an outside of Portland City Hall. This is in an airport. Mere minutes away from any number of fine gentlemen's clubs, and no I.D. pawn shops, Kat, where your grand dad might be if he wasn't sequestered in a basement watching Infomercials for Garlique hiding from a disease he's already vaccinated for. No wonder so many people think violence is an OK method to achieve political goals.

They're willing to use it for airline seats. We are watching generations not in decline but completely disconnected from agreed-upon standards of decency. I know every older generation says this about the young kids. But this feels kind of worse. It's about the loss of human interaction, the ability to reason and cooperate, which is the mark of success, the ability to see a problem through and figure out how to work toward a mutually beneficial outcome that doesn't include kicking someone in the head.

That behavior will earn you no upgrades at Delta or in life. But it's what successful people learn when they're young, impulse control, cooperation, hopefully from their parents or mentors or a suitable role model like Greg Gutfeld.

Without that, you don't have a future. You're at the bottom and your life goes down -- downhill from there. Well, unless you're Alec Baldwin, then you just look for someone to blame for that hill being there.

When I look at all of this, I wonder why no one intervened. Instead, the brawl just multiplied, which presented witnesses in their smartphones with a moral dilemma which fight do you film? The one where three guys are attempting to beat the fourth guy to death or the more evenly matched fight between the other four guys? Choose the wrong one, it may not go viral. And then how are you supposed to get self-esteem by earning the respect of your family and peers?

We're a nation of Ken Burns' minus the Sugar Bowl haircut. We're not just witnessing the decline of Western civilization, we're taping it. And why not? That's far easier than reversing it.

Meanwhile, people mostly stand around watching. Why intervene? That's not their job. You know, cops do that sort of thing. What a bunch of suckers and then we blame them. And really, why intervene? You might end up like a cop who prevents a stabbing because you're the bad guy trying to stop bad things from happening.

Finally, security did arrive, hooray. But no wonder the lockdown holds so much appeal for people with steady paychecks. I'm not afraid breaking lockdown rules because I might get COVID. I'm afraid too because I might get stabbed while pre-boarding. So, the big lesson, if you must travel just remember to do so in groups of three or fewer. Or take Greyhound. It has a higher-class clientele.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Period!

GUTFELD: Let's welcome tonight's guests. In college, he majored in saying the quiet part out loud. My fellow co-hosts on "THE FIVE" and "WATTERS WORLD" host, Jesse Watters, everybody.

He's so libertarian, he owns the rights to what sent over. Co-host of The Fifth Column podcast, Kmele Foster. He's done more screenwriting than a graffiti artist's craft in a mosquito den. T.V. writer and producer, Rob Long.

And she never cries over spilt milk. It's not like there's any clues in it. Host of "SINCERELY KAT" on Fox Nation, Kat Timpf.

Welcome to the show, Jesse.

JESSE WATTERS, FOX NEWS CHANNEL HOST: Thank you. I just want to congratulate you, Greg. No one ever thought you'd make it this far. And it's an honor to be on a show with an exclamation point behind it. Like other great shows such as Alvin and the Chipmunks. Scooby Dooby Doo, where are you! And I'm a Celebrity.Get me out of here!

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Which by the way, it's not good.

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: Which is how I'm feeling right now.

GUTFELD: I saw that one coming.

WATTERS: You did.

GUTFELD: You know what, I want to congratulate your assistant Johnny for coming up with those.

WATTERS: Are you saying you -- you don't think I do my own research?

GUTFELD: I'm saying we all know that.

WATTERS: OK. Well, that is not fake news.

GUTFELD: So, any thoughts? Are you -- you're probably upset that I got that tape before you got it for yourself?

WATTERS: We'll be using it on "WATTERS WORLD" this weekend.

GUTFELD: Yes. There's actually better tape but we couldn't get it.

WATTERS: Well, I'll get it by the time "WATTERS WORLD" tapes. I -- when I saw this I thought that's why Americans don't lose wars. Because we're ready to brawl over a standby seat at a Miami.

Imagine if they came for New Jersey. It'd be a bloodbath. And Gutfeld, where is the security when I go into an airport? My mother sets off an alarm with her fake hip and security descends on her like a terrorist.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Where is everybody?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: It, you know, used to have tough guys break up fights.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: You got a few licks in and then you go break it up. Now, all the tough guys just tape it and then sell it to TMZ.

GUTFELD: That is true.

WATTERS: Because if you get involved you get canceled.

GUTFELD: Right. That's true.

WATTERS: And you don't want that.

GUTFELD: No, no.

WATTERS: But I do know you did this video for one reason.

GUTFELD: Why?

WATTERS: To show how dangerous it is to fly commercial. So when you renegotiate your next contract you thought private. I'm on to you.

GUTFELD: It is odd to me.

KMELE FOSTER, HOST, THE FIFTH COLUMN: That is the right insight.

GUTFELD: You know, Kmele, I was -- when I was watching it, I -- it's like whatever happened to fair fights. Like if they were like -- if they each one paired off. I'd be OK with that. But there was three on one here. You know, it was like a lot of people kicking people when they're down.

FOSTER: Yes. You didn't ever do that.

GUTFELD: No. Probably do that anonymously.

(CROSSTALK)

FOSTER: I didn't know if we're doing a thing when you said fair fights you (INAUDIBLE) did there. I cannot imagine -- actually let me start here. The very best thing about the pandemic to the extent there could be a best thing about it was that the airports were completely empty.

GUTFELD: Yes.

FOSTER: And had all of these opportunities to ride on planes, fly in first class of course. Never coach because people like that are the ones and coach causing trouble.

GUTFELD: Yes.

FOSTER: But I -- all these opportunities to fly on the plane by myself.

GUTFELD: Yes.

FOSTER: Only me.

GUTFELD: Yes.

FOSTER: And now we're getting back to normal and there are complete utter brawls. Chaos.

GUTFELD: Yes.

FOSTER: In the standby line.

KAT TIMPF, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Well, but -- no, but the restaurants are still only at 50 percent capacity. So there's nothing to do so they got to do that. People want to do that.

FOSTER: So this is what we have to look forward to.

(CROSSTALK)

TIMPF: Yes.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Put a low standard of behavior, Kat.

TIMPF: All I'm saying is that guy --

GUTFELD: Look at the libertarian.

TIMPF: All I'm saying is that guy that did get beat up he decided not to press charges. He's probably like that punch hurt but I feel alive again.

(CROSSTALK)

ROB LONG, T.V. WRITER AND PRODUCER: That is the weirdest thing.

GUTFELD: I will say this, Rob. I remember when I had that kind of energy. I got exhausted just following the action. Did you look at it and go wow, you can barely move, you know, from the chair.

LONG: I just mesmerized by the pants right now. No, look, I think what -- I think what you said in your monologue was maybe the dumbest thing I've ever heard you say. Well, you wanted back ---

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: I like this guy.

LONG: What about -- what about this isn't the greatest thing we've seen in a year. That's normal. That's not -- that's not going to happen pre-COVID all the time. And this is normal. People on standby fighting and going crazy. And like -- and then -- this is fantastic.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: It's over. We're fighting in airports again. We're back, man. We're back.

(CROSSTALK)

FOSTER: We're fighting over what matters.

LONG: This made me so happy. I'm like, more.

GUTFELD: Would you -- Rob, would you have intervened? Should you?

LONG: You know, what, are you kidding? At that point, I'm in the TGI Fridays, like, two-thirds of the way through the Margaritas.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: Like the -- no, I wouldn't have --

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: You ever --- would you go for the larger one? You ever go for the larger beverage? Like when they offer you an extra shot?

LONG: Oh, yes. I mean, they -- don't offer to me. I ordered it ahead of time. You can't, it's the polite reply.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: It would be rude to send the shot back. Oh my god, I start with this is all going to be supersized.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Also, did they not have masks on? That's where I --

(CROSSTALK)

TIMPF: That's where I have the real problem.

LONG: That was in Miami by the way. I just came back from Miami. COVID didn't happen in Miami.

TIMPF: Yes, yes.

GUTFELD: No one stopped.

FOSTER: No.

GUTFELD: Although I was there in 4th of July and they did close down the beaches which was ridiculous.

LONG: That was because you were in a Speedo

GUTFELD: Yes. Yes, actually it was a --

(CROSSTALK)

TIMPF: The beaches were close to view.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: All right, up next, what happens when woke workers try to take on the boss?

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: They think they have the power to make their boss's cower. Some employees at Simon and Schuster, they're not two people, have submitted a petition demanding they stop making book deals with people from the Trump administration.

This after the company side Mike Pence, the former vice president, Jesse, to a two-book deal earlier this month. Last week the CEO pushed back on the petition saying, "We come to work each day to publish not to cancel" which is very good.

The petition collected about 3700 signatures, but only about 216 were from actual employees. What's weird is the very next day Simon and Schuster announced 216 new job openings. I wish.

Meanwhile, some people at SNL who didn't buy Tesla's stock are pissed off that Elon Musk is hosting the show next month. Who canceled? Warren Buffett?

On May 8th, the show will be hosted by Elon Musk and the musical guests will be Miley Cyrus, where she will be turning 50. No, she looks great. She looks great. You can hear her voice though, very raspy.

After the announcement was made, Musk tweeted, "Let's find out just how live SNL really is." Cast member Bowen Yang responded on Instagram. What the F does this even mean? Which is a fair question especially since most of the crew members Musk plans to send to Mars will die.

TIMF: Yes.

GUTFELD: And Aidy Bryant shared a Bernie Sanders tweet about how the 50th wealthiest people own more than the bottom half of Americans. Hilarious, follow her for laughs.

Musk happens to be the third richest person in the world pending any more Bezos divorces. To put that in context, Lorne Michaels is also filthy rich, you idiot. So we've got workplaces where the employees are whining about company business, but in both cases, the company businesses involved speech, which apparently the complainers wish to silence, perhaps because they hate older white males. Let's ask an expert.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: OK. So, they don't want to publish these authors or let this guy on T.V. because they don't agree with them? That's a tough one. Give me a second. I'm good at this. I got it. Don't buy the book. Change the channel.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Angry white male, Rob.

WATTERS: You were supposed to cast me for that guy.

GUTFELD: Yes, you're a little too on the nose for that one.

LONG: I didn't think I was that angry.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: You wouldn't have to stretch. I just have to wake you up. Rob, you work in T.V. -- go ahead.

(CROSSTALK)

LONG: First of all -- I say (INAUDIBLE) handle that power tool.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: Like he knows what a power tool is.

GUTFELD: Yes.

(CROSSTALK)

LONG: I mean, and they gave the Oscar to Anthony Hopkins? This guy is delivering for you every -- oh, my god. Talent.

GUTFELD: Don't say that. Don't say that because (INAUDIBLE) money. I got him in that Fox internship program.

LONG: You still have that?

GUTFELD: Yes, yes.

LONG: That should have been canceled a long --

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Yes. Do you have any thoughts left?

LONG: Yes. I have two thoughts. One, for (INAUDIBLE) like, Elon Musk invented an electric car.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: That used to be something that people who are progressive would be like, yes, electric car.

GUTFELD: Right.

LONG: The most famous electric car in the world he invented. He's also kind of a weirdo, oddball, free thinking, unpredictable character. You'd think that that would be somebody those people would want to have around just for laughs because that's the point of the show.

GUTFELD: Right.

LONG: They don't want that. They want normal. Everybody wants normal.

GUTFELD: Exactly. That use to be against normal.

(CROSSTALK)

LONG: But they -- but now they're for normal. And they only I'd say about Simon and Schuster is, I mean, I don't know how many -- I mean, how many Trump administration figures could they publish? I mean, ton, right? There's -- he fired people and rehired them and fired them like once or twice, three times a week.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: Sorry. 2,000 people that one job there.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: There's no way they could publish them all.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: Pence is enough.

GUTFELD: It's still in their Twitter handle though. Yes. Right.

LONG: Oh, yes.

GUTFELD: Kmele, to Rob's point, it's like we are kind of like going after like -- it's -- this is a guy who is an independent thinker, who's kind of quirky. But he's got to go back just for that. He's got to be just -- he has to believe everything they believe.

FOSTER: Yes. Well, Elon is among the only like super-duper wealthy people who actually when you hear him talk, you imagine this is what he really means because he actually says the things that he means in most instances, but I'm also wondering about like, SNL, which has not been funny for a very long time. I just don't -- Elon doesn't strike me as a guy with a tremendous amount of comedic timing.

GUTFELD: Yes.

FOSTER: I don't know that he's going to bring the whole quality of the show up very high. Although the show hasn't been funny in some time.

GUTFELD: You know, speaking of funny, can I ask you a question? Why do you have an extra pair of shoes?

FOSTER: I couldn't decide which shoes to wear. So, I have the Yeezys but we could go with the whites. Maybe I'll switch at some point.

GUTFELD: You didn't want to wear the white shoes. Did you?

FOSTER: I mean, do you want me to put the white shoes on?

GUTFELD: Because we're angry white males?

FOSTER: Well, I don't --

TIMPF: Actually me.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: I don't believe in -- I don't believe in race. I don't practice that non-sense. I wear --

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: This is the first. First, somebody brings an extra pair of shoes as if like there might be a mud puddle on this (INAUDIBLE)

FOSTER: It is entirely possible. One never knows what they'll encounter.

GUTFELD: That is true, especially on this show. I tend to have accidents now and again. Kat, you're no accident. I don't even know what that means. It was just a segue.

TIMPF: I don't think I was because I was the oldest.

GUTFELD: If you ever came to me and said to me, I don't want that guest on the show because I disagree with his beliefs. What do you think I've been saying?

TIMPF: We would never have any guests on the show. We would never --

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Because I like think for myself about things, right? Like, I don't agree with everything that Mike Pence believes. And I know that because I was able to listen to and read them.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: And form an opinion which is a valuable thing. He's also a former vice president. He's not just like some random bridge troll, like not that I would not read that book because bridge troll life -- fascinating.

LONG: Yes.

TIMPF: But -- like a lot of people do agree with him. And a -- you would want to understand that and engage with that and be able to have more knowledge and not less about an entire period in history. And to have this view that your view is not just like the only, you know, view that is desirable for people to consume, but acceptable to people -- to people to consume is arrogant. And thinking that makes you like a good person is also delusional.

GUTFELD: Yes. You know, it's cowardice. It's a fear that maybe that person's other ideas might influence yours. You should be so confident.

Jesse, you have a special announcement since we're talking about books, right?

WATTERS: Greg, you really blew that setup. I want to talk about Simon and Schuster first. The Trump people have goals. And it's because they spent hours and hours around President Trump. Think about how many offhanded insane comments he just said passing by. I was lucky enough to have dinner with him at the White House.

GUTFELD: Whoa. Really?

WATTERS: And he spent 20 minutes ranking all of the fighters in the world by their ferocity, Taliban, Kamikaze, ISIS. That right there is a chapter. You got to -- if you have that, you have to publish that.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: That's -- I thought you meant like professional fighters. This is even better.

WATTERS: No, no. Like actual fighters that try to kill people. And then on the "Saturday Night Live" thing, do you remember in school when they pair you up into group project?

GUTFELD: Right.

WATTERS: And you got paired up with a maniac, and you'd roll your eyes because, you know, you'd have to carry the maniac. Whether it be Jimmy or Johnny or Jesse, whoever that person is. You can't raise your hand to the teacher and say, Lauren Michaels, I don't want to work with this guy.

GUTFELD: Right.

WATTERS: You want to work with the maniac especially when the maniac is rich.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: Whatever happened to sucking up to wealthy people? This guy come - - most comes on the show. You throwback drinks after the show on Saturday night, then, he's in your Rolodex.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: So the next time you go out to L.A. you call him up and you say, can we come over? Just to impress your friends?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: And then maybe next rocket ship takes off. You're on standby. And that's the standby you want to fight for, right?

GUTFELD: Well done. All right.

WATTERS: That's it though.

GUTFELD: Up next. The states that are losing congressional seats, can you guess which one?

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Are the east and west coast finally toast? According to recent census data, both New York State and California lost congressional seats due to stalled population growth. True. They've lost more people than General Custer. That's an old joke.

People aren't just calmly walking out in New York State, they're leaving skid marks. The three main reason, taxes, COVID lockdowns, and dying in nursing homes.

But also rising crime as police morale plummets, retirement rates for New York cops are skyrocketing jumping 75 percent from a year ago. Sadly, the retirement rates for murderers, robbers, and rapists, they're holding steady.

Meanwhile, in places like Texas, the population is growing at a much faster rate giving them too more seats in the House of Representatives. That's not the case in California where U-Haul trucks are getting harder to find than Kevin Spacey. Yes, people are leaving the state faster than terrified teens at an Art Kelly pool party. I stopped it too. And thought there might have been a third one then, but I figured no two are enough. Kmele, you did something interesting.

FOSTER: Yes.

GUTFELD: You left New York.

FOSTER: Yes.

GUTFELD: At the right, just about the right time. But then you moved to California.

FOSTER: It was a strange decision. Right outside of San Francisco of all places?

GUTFELD: Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. How's the smell?

FOSTER: Well, you know, I'm in, I'm in Tiburon. Yes. Which is, you know, across the bay there and is lovely. Marion County is beautiful. The only problem I have is, a lot of my neighbors they just lurch at the opportunity to talk to me, to express their ally ship. How much they care and how important I am and how much my life matters. It's a little bit overwhelming.

WATTERS: You want to be like you were in New York?

FOSTER: It would be nice. I said before, like, it there's something a bit get out-ish about, like everywhere you turn, there's a sign that says your life matters. We really care. You belong here. We want you to stay.

WATTERS: It's a little creepy.

GUTFELD: Oh my God. That is so funny. And true, Kat, you know, when the people flee, and they go to these other states, should they be allowed to vote?

KAT TIMPF, FOX NEWS CHANNEL CONTRIBUTOR: Yes.

GUTFELD: All right, next question.

TIMPF: I mean, I don't think there's any way they can --

GUTFELD: Temporary ban, five years. Temporary voting ban so they don't ruin the state they move to. Unless it's Kmele, because he's just moving to California, same thing from New York.

TIMPF: Yes, I'm not really sure what the legal basis for a law like that would be?

GUTFELD: There is none.

TIMPF: Right. Exactly. That would be my concern. But you know, sure, that look, I love the way that this is was framed as like population shift, et cetera, and not like people fleeing syringe and you know, feces littered tyrannical wastelands. But member --

GUTFELD: That's your apartment.

TIMPF: Oh, yes, well --

GUTFELD: I've been there.

TIMPF: Look, not since we got the cleaning lady. But like, remember what everyone was saying over the summer? Oh, GOP people said everyone's going to flee New York, and everyone's going to flee California. And it's this talking point, and it's like, well, no, it sucks here.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes. And so people are actually voting with their feet.

TIMPF: With their feet.

GUTFELD: Yes, I just came up with that line, Jesse.

WATTERS: That's why he's got two pair of shoes, right?

GUTFELD: Yes. Yes.

WATTERS: He's going to vote twice.

GUTFELD: I bet he's a democrat.

FOSTER: Or not at all.

WATTERS: Definitely Democrat.

FOSTER: Or not at all.

WATTERS: You know, it's like a social scene in this country. Gutfeld. Do you want to go to a party in New York with a $20.00 cover with mask rules with speech codes in a dangerous neighborhood? Or do you want to go to a party in Texas, where everyone gets in for free? There's no curfew and there's $5.00 pitchers. That's the party you want to go?

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: So these, these blue states are paying a price for their uptight policies. But I saw this when I saw this Gutfeld, it's -- I think the American birth rate is at its slowest rate since the 30s. So, I was walking Jesse Jr., my newborn the other day in the stroller, and he pokes his head up and he said, Dad, and he said, we really need to increase the American birth rate. So, we don't become like Japan or the E.U. and have a bloated welfare state. I said, son, that's a very astute observation.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: And then he said, thank you for conceiving me. And then I said, thank your mother. But it's true, you really need to start having --

TIMPF: Your three-week-old son thinks I should get pregnant.

WATTERS: There are exceptions to every rule.

GUTFELD: His beliefs on climate change are unparalleled. That book of Haiku poetry.

Rob, you now did the opposite that Kmele did.

ROB LONG, T.V. PRODUCER AND SCREENWRITER: I did.

GUTFELD: You move from LA California to New York just at the worst time.

LONG: We cancel each other out. I don't believe it was the worst time to leave California. I just didn't realize I was leaving one thing to the other. I was stepping over one refuse to another refuse. Anyway, your kid sounds a little slow to me.

WATTER: I'll get him into any school he want, no worries.

LONG: I was surprised, in the New York census though. It's like it's only like two dozen. Two dozen. Like Yes, like I don't have my votes, but counts. And I remember, I filled out the My New York census I did that I kind of put it off. And then I had to do it because it's the law. And I think I got a little drunk. And I may have had some fun with some of the ethnic like designation. So if there's a federal program, multibillion dollar program coming out soon for people whose ethnicity is that they come from undersea kingdoms. That was me. I apologize. I was just making a little joke.

GUTFELD: Yes. You know what, it worked. I'll tell you what, New York City is disgusting.

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: It is. You know that the homeless now don't just have a shopping cart. It's like full on Sanford and Son. Yes, there's a guy that's got boy that's talking about a reference that nobody remembers. I mean, Sanford and Son. It was a junk shop for God's sake.

LONG: That was older than kind --

TIMPF: I'm so young. Sorry I'm just so young and beautiful, I have so much life ahead of me.

GUTFELD: All right, still to come the Supreme Court cheerleader case, the end all Supreme Court cheerleader.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Should you pass for talking smack outside of class. This week, the Supreme Court which is like a regular court but with cheese and sour cream, we'll hear arguments in a case that could decide if schools can punish kids for saying things off campus including on social media. It began with a 14- year-old from Pennsylvania named brandy levy. As a sophomore, she got cut from the varsity cheerleading squad and there myself.

So, she went on Snapchat, gave the finger, started cursing, f-school, f- cheerleading, f-everything. It was terrible. First, her post was all wrong. It should have started with give me an F, give me a U. But you know when I got cut from the varsity cheerleading squad, I took it like a man. I eat a half gallon of cookie dough ice cream and cried myself to sleep while watching "The Notebook."

Anyway, Ryan, the coach saw the post and suspended her from the J.V. squad for a year, even though the video was made off campus, so her parents sued saying or free speech rights were violated. Two lower courts agreed and she was put back on the team. But the school district appealed to the Supreme Court, and here we are. For more, let's check in with Supreme Court Correspondent Joe Machi. What's up, Joe? Can you talk about the legal precedents as this relates to Tinker versus Des Moines in 1969?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JOE MACHI, COMEDIAN: Greg, in Tinker versus Des Moines, the Supreme Court ruled 72 that students do have free speech rights as long as it's not disruptive. But no one will believe that coming for me, because I'm wearing a tablecloth and awake for some reason, even though that's judges in England, when can I come inside?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Never. You will never be allowed inside. Kat, as a woman.

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: This issue of cheerleading, but strike at the core of your very being, never were a cheerleader.

TIMPF: You really have a solid understanding of what is important to me, Greg. Really. Look this is obviously just absurd. I don't think schools should be able to, you know, have any say and what kids do off, you know, off of the campus. People like well, what about bullying? It's like, OK, well, it's not good. It's not the school's business. And also, if you're never bullied, you don't have any trauma, you will never grow up to be funny. So, you'll be OK.

GUTFELD: So, apparently, you're saying Jesse was never bullied?

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: Jesse, you have 12 daughters. I mean, would you ever let them cheerlead?

WATTERS: I know about two of them. If I were a cheerleading coach, which --

GUTFELD: And who's to say you aren't?

WATTERS: My parole officer says I'm legally not allowed to. I would cut this girl because she said --

TIMPF: Oh, like, from the team. OK, sorry.

WATTERS: You're a sick person.

TIMPF: I was like, where are you, Kat? OK, sorry.

WATTERS: We're on tape, right? Because she's destroying morale. And we have state championships coming up, and I run a very elite cheerleading squad. But in general --

GUTFELD: You're getting good at this.

WATTERS: Yes. In general, I don't like schools, punishing students for what they're doing off campus. I like the cat and mouse game. If you get caught leaving campus, you go do whatever you do. If they don't catch you doing that, you're good. If they catch you coming back on campus, then they can nail you for that. But you should be able to do whatever you want off campus, especially on weekends.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: The headmaster should not be able to punish you for that, your parents should punish you for that. My parents, they were both headmaster, so I got punished two times. So, it was a tricky situation.

TIMPF: All she did was say, (BLEEP) cheerleading, (BLEEP) everything. Like, that's not -- the school's you need to get involved. Like that's a great shirt that they should have sold at hot topic at the time.

FOSTER: This is a public, this is a public school, yes? I mean, this is state censorship. Pure and simple. I mean, it's very, very straightforward.

GUTFELD: Really? So, that's how you would look at it?

FOSTER: Absolutely.

GUTFELD: yes, yes. So, the lot -- you know, they're going to hear arguments, I think tomorrow, as I pretend to know what I'm talking about.

FOSTER: Wait, wait, wait, you can say (BLEEP) on GUTFELD?

GUTFELD: That's the --

FOSTER: How is this now my first booking?

WATTERS: Now, now that you've called attention to it, the FCC are going to come down.

FOSTER: I'm going to do this show every night.

GUTFELD: We do bleep it now and again. I don't know any more. You know, Rob, the bottom line, if we had this technology when we were growing up in the 90s, we'd all be screwed. Right?

LONG: Well, I guess if that if that. I feel like this is the worst John Hughes movie ever. Like, what, also like it isn't, it is the idea that the profanity. I mean, have these people heard Cardi B? Like the, like, you can listen to in the school? I think what you said --

TIMPF: You listen to Cardi B in the school?

LONG: You can go to school and listen to it, can't you? I don't know, I don't know how schools work anymore.

GUTFELD: She's the young woman who sings about the (INAUDIBLE).

LONG: She sings about being excited.

GUTFELD: OK, she sings about getting excited about the (INAUDIBLE).

LONG: I don't know, I went to school in Switzerland. I kind of feel like, I mean, she's got a case but on the other hand, it seems personal like they didn't like the what she said about, she just used those words about the yogurt store. I don't know. I'm making this up. I don't know how -- they wouldn't have had any problem with it. And since you said something about them and they're kind of mad, it seems punitive to me but you're not allowed to do.

FOSTER: What's a yogurt store?

LONG: Where do the kids hangout? At local yogurt store, right?

GUTFELD: Every time I ask that question, people just look at me weird.

LONG: I'm not allowed 30 yards outside of a yogurt store.

GUTFELD: You got to register because you're not cultured. I know. I can't resist. Rose McGowan said that Democrats are in a cult. We discussed. That's next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: The Dems are a cult says Rose and given her past, she knows. Me Too activist and Founder, basically, and Actress, Rose McGowan, who herself grew up in the children of God cult, go COG said on fox news last night that she believes that Democrats are in a cult too.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

ROSE MCGOWAN, ME TOO ACTIVIST: I leave the Republicans alone more because I do respect people more than are like this is what we are. This is what we're about. This is what we're against. Whereas I find that the Democrats are really pretty much almost against all the same things. They're against changing the world for the better and they're for keeping a system in place. That is for so few people and benefits so few, but they masquerade as the as the helpers.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: McGowan 2024. She said she sees Democrats serving a master they may they may not be, but that may not be serving them. Well, that was tough. So, what's your advice for people in these divided times?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

MCGOWAN: Your personal freedom comes at the price of you realizing how you're being controlled and where it's coming from? In separate, I would make a list your belief system and figure out what your belief system what part of it is organic to you and what part has been implanted either by Hollywood or the media or, or your leaders, right?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Great idea.

MCGOWAN: What part of it is truly yours? What's organic to you and see what the polyester is and pull it out of your fabric?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: We now check in with a former CNN viewer who's been pulling a lot of stuff out of his fabric.

You know, this is America, we want videos that are in English. I didn't understand a word.

WATTERS: I like the angry white man better. It's not what I meant.

GUTFELD: To Rob, this goes to your very original point. Here is it another kind of independent thinker being expunged from the Democrats, they have nowhere to go inevitably, they end up in this. There's going to be this new place for all of these people to go somewhere. It won't be -- I don't know where it would be.

WATTERS: It's called Fox. We're going to hire her. She's the next Fox News Contributor.

GUTFELD: Give her an hour. I would listen to her for an hour.

FOSTER: Give her this hour.

GUTFELD: Hey! Up next, Gutfeld and McGowan.

WATTERS: Oh, I like that.

GUTFELD: Or McGowan and Gutfeld. Yes, McGowan and Gutfeld.

WATTERS: You'll fight for Gutfeld and McGowan, I know how petty you are.

TIMPF: So, then, I'm just fired.

WATTERS: No, we're going to keep you around.

LONG: Gutfeld is off tonight. He'll be like that for a week. Gutfeld is off tonight. He's on an assignment.

WATTERS: He has a new assignment at a yogurt store.

LONG: Yes, I counsel caution.

GUTFELD: Yes.

LONG: Sometimes someone says something and we agree with that person. But that doesn't mean that the next thing that person might say would not be insane.

GUTFELD: Yes, that's --

LONG: I have a feeling that there's some insane stuff that he's like, what's up? He goes, yes, you know what we ought to, we ought to cut capital gains. We ought to like bake the income tax lower. We got to shrink government. And be like, yes, yes. And we ought to get in a spaceship. You got to like, me, like, go slow, simmer down my friends. So, it's nice that somebody said that. I think she's probably right. But I'm just, let's, let's take a minute.

TIMPF: That's why it's more important to evaluate issues on a case by case basis, rather than being in the situation where you have to idolize people that oh, because they're in the same political party. And you know, like, honestly, if you're saying, hey, I have a problem with this person, this person has done things I think are wrong. You say, shut up, they're a leader on your side. You can't say that. That is a cult.

GUTFELD: Yes, it is a cult.

FOSTER: She seem to be taken a swipe at partisanship more broadly.

TIMPF: Yes. Yes.

FOSTER: I mean, even what she had to say about Republicans, I leave them alone, because they tell me what they're about. That doesn't sound like a compliment at all. As someone who is very skeptical of most of the, the two major political parties, I can -- some of those vibes resonate with me. But I also robbed off the same sort of skepticism.

I see shades of Kanye there, like a lot of people got very enthusiastic when Kanye seemed to be gravitating towards their guy, Donald Trump. Like Kanye also ended up running against him, right? I don't know that it made much of a difference. But, but folks like this, who have these kinds of changes of hearts, I don't know that they're going to be very reliable political allies.

LONG: And I agree with you, Kmele, because I am an ally.

FOSTER: It's appropriate for you --

LONG: How are you?

TIMPF: Your life matters.

FOSTER: I feel seen.

LONG: Thank you. I see you. I see you.

GUTFELD: Jesse, I disagree with all of them. I think she is an amazing force.

WATTERS: Yes, me too. I'm ready to vote for her in 2024. I mean, they're much more sophisticated than I am. I hear one thing that I agree with, and I'm like, yes, like, let's go. And I've been saying the Democrats have been a cult for years. No one does segments on what I say. One Democrat has an epiphany and she goes all over the news.

TIMPF: People do segments than what you put in those articles.

WATTERS: Those are negative. And those are all fake news.

LONG: Maybe you got to develop like kind of a crazy stare that seemed to be working.

WATTERS: I'll work on that.

LONG: And headphones, big headphones.

GUTFELD: She's made some incredibly coaching decisions like dating Marilyn Manson. So, I think you know that, that counts, right? One more segment of awesomeness coming up.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Of course, you would. Before we go let's do this.

ANNOUNCER: "GREG EXPLAINS THE SEXES."

GUTFELD: Sometimes you'll come across a video that explains the difference between men and women, and a reaction to something disgusting. Roll it.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Where is it? Where's it? Where's it? Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. It's awesome. That is so awesome.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: See, what she finds disgusting, Jessie, he sees as awesome. Are feral creature in their house, awesome or disgusting?

TIMPF: I actually get along quite well a feral creature.

WATTERS: So, I don't want to talk about this at all. I will say that I want to make an announcement. And I will be making an announcement tomorrow on "THE FIVE." It's a personal announcement.

TIMPF: She's pregnant again?

WATTERS: I am straight. It's not that announcement. Despite what people say in these negative articles, were positive articles.

FOSTER: Positive.

WATTERS: Remember?

GUTFELD: All right.

WATTERS: So, that announcement will be forthcoming.

GUTFELD: Even though the show is taped. Biden's addressing Congress tomorrow, so we'll be back on Thursday night. Boo! In the meantime, set your DVRs so you never miss an episode. Thanks to Jesse Watters, Kmele Foster, Rob Long, Kat, our studio audience. "FOX NEWS @ NIGHT" is next. I'm Greg Gutfeld. I love you, America.

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