Tea Parties Lack 'Extremist' Violence

So just as the other networks predicted, the April 15 tea parties were nothing but cauldrons brimming with rage. Rage against Obama, rage against the government, rage against these tough times. Take a look for yourself:

(BEGIN VIDEO TAPE)

ANTI-ISRAEL PROTESTER: Go back to the oven! You need a big oven, that's what you need!

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Oh, sorry. Wrong tape. There must be a new guy in the control room — probably from MSNBC.

Anyway, while I was watching the protests, I couldn't help but feel the anger building among these folks and I knew it wouldn't be long before their fury would turn frightening. Like here:

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G20 PROTESTER SHOUTS

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Whoops. My apologies, we can't seem to get this right. Anyway, can we actually show some real footage of what went on Wednesday?

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TED NUGENT GUITAR SOLO

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Yep, those look like real extremists. Actually, they look like people who own riding mowers.

Fact is, I could find only one arrest among the hundreds of demonstrations that took place across the country. Sure, I didn't look too hard — but still: Why is that not the story of the day?

I mean, not one person threw a chair through a store window. But that's probably because that person owns the chair or the store or it could be a chair store.

Also, I noticed that most people at the parties were kind of like me: over 40 and overweight. And it's hard to throw chairs when you get winded throwing a Frisbee.

But no matter, whether you care or not, the mainstream media would rather have you look at these people not just as jokes but as cranks.

Which is why someone needs to buy Susan Roesgen a mirror.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com