Reasoning With Ceramic Frogs

It's been four days since the inauguration, but one phrase still sticks: when President Obama offered to "extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist."

Now, I usually say the same thing to John Gibson when he catches me using his hair gel, but here Obama is referring to angry Islamic militants.

So I'm thinking maybe it's time to remind everyone currently enveloped in this euphoric change bubble of one thing: That while we go to work — 9 to 5, every day — there's a group of people doing the very same thing, day in and day out. But their goal isn't to exceed sales figures from last year. They punch the clock every day with the only purpose to destroy us.

So really, asking these folks to "unclench a fist," is like trying to reason with a ceramic frog. I mean, as elegant as you sound, you're still trying to reason with a ceramic frog. You look silly.

Even so, our very handsome president mentioned a new era, one based on "mutual respect," which suggests we somehow deserve this global scorn. No surprise: America often leads the world in anti-Americanism.

But am I nuts in thinking that we weren't the ones who left a giant hole in Manhattan? And that afterwards, the expected backlash never happened? I mean, we're the only country — ever — to worry about hurting people's feelings, after being brutalized.

I only hope that when President Obama realizes madmen don't respond to mojo, he'll know how to make a fist.

And if you disagree with it, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com