The Internet Gone Mad: Stop talking about white and gold dress. Now.

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Dress debate: What color do you see?

Tumblr post divides the internet

I’m color blind. There’s not much good that comes from being color blind. Traffic lights are a challenge. I can never be a pilot. My wife frequently sends me back into the closet to change the frightful mélange of colors in which I’ve adorned myself, and I’m useless as a sounding board for her when she’s shopping (there’s also the fact that she looks stunningly beautiful in any color).

I love Facebook, I tweet a lot, I’ve been known to Instagram on occasion. But this? This national debate over what color a dress may or may not be? What has happened to us?

But finally I’ve found the silver (or is it blue?) lining to being color blind. The gold/white, black/blue dress debate doesn’t matter to me. To me it’s green, blue, yellow, white, red, turquoise, magenta, grey, green and every other color on this great earth. And I don’t care.

I love Facebook, I tweet a lot, I’ve been known to Instagram on occasion. But this? This national debate over what color a dress may or may not be? What has happened to us?

If you see it a certain way, and like it, buy the damn thing. If you don’t it doesn’t matter. It just doesn’t matter -- not in a real sense, to anyone. No one. Not a single soul. But somehow the color combinations and what different brains and eyes register has taken Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and every water cooler conversation by storm.

People are fighting, yes fighting, over what colors they see in a dress. I hereby declare the Internet broken, the world gone mad, and our public discourse officially dumb and dumber.

Get a life people. This is a free country. See what you like. Wear what you like. Say what you like. Just stop doing it on social media.

Look, I love Facebook, I tweet a lot, I’ve been known to Instagram on occasion. But this? This national debate over what color a dress may or may not be?

What has happened to us? What has happened to debating the great issues of the day? New ideas on tackling terrorism, reaching across religious and cultural divides, discussing ways to end poverty in America and around the world, guarding our privacy in the digital era?

Hey, why talk about those things when there’s an ugly dress to talk about that could be blue and black or may be white and gold, or perhaps is made in both color combinations and there’s more than one photo of it. (Now there’s a whole new conspiracy theory to set Tumblr alight!)  The social square where we could all talk to each other and make the world a better, more inter-connected place has become a black hole of banality.

Just stop it.

And leave me alone in my purple and red pajamas. I’m watching llamas on the loose. They’re black and white. I think.