Greg Gutfeld: As Chris Cuomo is being dragged, we're missing the big picture

Happy Wednesday everyone. Or as the Cuomos call it – "hump day."

So how is CNN covering the Chris Cuomo scandal? He was once their big star. But now, how they do they feel?

Skit of CNN guests complaining about Chris Cuomo’s Hampton parties

On Tuesday, Anderson Cooper did address the suspension. But look who was on set with him as he did it.

Cooper: Jeff Toobin, John Dean appreciate it. Some news now about this network. It is about Chris Cuomo the host of Cuomo Prime Time 

Well that's awkward. Having Toobin there, as you discuss Chris, it's a weird message you’re sending – at CNN you can't defend a weenie, but it's alright to throttle one in public! It also shows you how shallow the talent pool is at CNN. But I guess Anthony Wiener was busy.

Meanwhile, on his radio show, Chris Cuomo figured out who to blame.

Chris Cuomo blaming media for not liking his brother: You can fight against the other party, and you can fight against the media, but only if you have your party … he had the Republicans hating him … the media never really liked him

So the media never liked his brother. You sure about that?

Montage of media fawning over Andrew Cuomo

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Yeah – the media never liked him. And what better way to show their dislike for someone than by awarding them an Emmy! Following that logic, I better start building a trophy case tonight.

But as Chris is being dragged, we're missing the big picture. And I don't mean a photo of Brian Stelter's ass-trology sign. Chris is in trouble for supporting his brother. So he's a terrible journalist, but a helluva brother. But what's the media's excuse for doing the same thing?

Hate him or not, Chris did what any family member would do – and broke whatever journalistic laws CNN still observes in the process. Fire him, I guess. But if CNN fired everyone for violating basic journalism, their newsroom would be emptier than your medicine cabinet after Kat visits you.

Anyway, if anything were to happen to a sibling or a child in your family – jerk or not – you'd probably do everything possible to help them out. Except maybe Jesse Watters' family. Kidnappers could mail them one of Jesse’s fingers, and they'd be like: "Eh, he's got nine more!"

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But, if I ever get busted for something, and my sisters don’t help me bury the bodies – they're out of the will. Their loss is "Kars for Kids" gain. Seriously, what's the point of having relatives if they’re gonna rat you out about the body under all that venison you have in the freezer? That’s why Joe let Hunter run all those bribery schemes... That and the 10%. 

So I get Chris. But the media – they don't have that excuse. They anointed his brother the next president 'cuz they liked his press conferences. They’re so easy to fool, Jussie Smollett wishes they were his jury. 

The media loved the governor, and they weren't related, except by ideology. Now the same people who say now that he should be fired, were right there fawning over his brother – as nursing home patients' bodies were stacking up like sandbags along a swollen riverbank.

They cared more about Andy’s sex life than investigating the nursing home calamity right in front of them. And it took sexual harassment to pique their curiosity.

I get it – sexual harassment is bad. If anyone’s butt is getting slapped, it’s my own. And I pay consenting adults dearly for that service. But it is interesting how the media prioritizes, and how they happily disown the very people they had protected for so long when it suits them. But for a while, they were on team Cuomo.

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Apparently, top aides had been working the press to convince them to support the governor. And they did. In one case, Cuomo aides reached out to schmooze a writer for The Atlantic, who then quickly wrote a piece entitled "Of course Andrew Cuomo isn't going to resign." That aged as well as Macaulay Culkin. 

Lis Smith, an adviser to Andrew Cuomo, revealed that she texted with MSNBC anchor Katy Tur during the scandal – and claimed that the host repeated her "spin" on air. MSNBC – the same place that still employs a racist homophobe whose name rhymes with Joy Reid. But I guess if everyone goes after Chris, the creep doing the Louie Farrakhan impression every night sneaks under the radar. 

Then there's CNN itself. They've unloaded fake news like it was free government cheese. James Clapper gets caught lying to Congress about intelligence. Then CNN hires him to analyze intelligence.   

Their Russian collusion lie undermined every institution for years. Their attacks on police led to the defunding of cops, contributing to violence that destroyed cities. 

They covered Florida when their COVID numbers spike. Now that they’re the lowest in America, they’re quieter than Matt Lauer’s work phone. 

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They targeted Trumpers, while coddling rioters. No wonder their ratings suck. If their numbers get any lower, they’ll have trouble paying Nick Sandmann. And now they cover Chris as though they were on top of it all along.

Stelter: it was known that Chris Cuomo was talking to his brother, giving political advice, but in the newly released documents you can see that Chris Cuomo is essentially working as an unpaid adviser, an aide, as if he’s a staffer of the governor, giving political advice and giving commentary, also working his own sources to try to find out more about what might be revealed about his brother.

Nice work pop 'n fresh. He reports those facts as if they weren't pretending the problem didn't exist for months. They hid this story until they could hide it no longer.

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And yeah, Chris Cuomo is a problem. But he's not the whole problem. Part of the tumor has been removed, but some of it is still there. It's still growing – even as it expels one of its own.

That's because the corporate press will do what's good for the corporate press. And when one of theirs goes down, they're just happy it's not them.

This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld's opening monologue on the December 1, 2021 edition of "Gutfeld!"