Pat O’Brien: 'I was almost dead from alcohol'

Pat O’Brien’s outrageous memoir, “I’ll Be Right Back After This,” chronicles his incredible career and recovery from alcoholism. The 66-year-old host has covered six Olympic Games, countless Super Bowls and NBA Finals. He was also the anchor of “Access Hollywood” and “The Insider.” O’Brien spoke to FOX411 about the book and that infamous drunken phone message.

FOX411: Why did you write this book?
O’Brien: I wanted to write it because I had a big story and I had a big life. I have a big life and I had an amazing career and it just spanned everywhere and I wanted to tell the story in my voice not Wikipedia’s voice. Also now coming up on six years sober, it’s a story more than anything of redemption, second chances and my honest goal is to let people know that if they have a problem with alcohol, there’s a way out; there’s a choice you can make; there’s a solution. This book makes that very clear.

FOX411: When that phone message was released, did you think your career was over?
O’Brien: At that time I was feeling nothing. Obviously I didn’t make that tape with a clear mind. I’ve never really heard the whole thing. I get it. I have a unique voice, maybe one of the most famous voices in America because it’s so nasally and whiskey filled. The damn thing was I couldn’t remember doing it. I could not piece together those days. The worst thing was I embarrassed my son who was in high school at the time.

FOX411: You were forced to go on Dr. Phil’s show afterwards.
O’Brien: It was torture. Dr. Phil showed me that day he knows nothing about alcoholism. The fact that he would take me five days out of rehab, have me sit down for an interview. I don’t even remember doing that show. It was awful. I was terrified at the time. I wanted to keep my job. He’s a bully but that’s what I did too. I was a person who came on and talked about other people’s problems.

FOX411: You did a ton of coke yet you quit cold turkey.
O’Brien: I did do a lot of coke. I bought a kilo of coke in Colombia and when that trip was over in ’83 I just came home and stopped. I stopped coke dead. I stopped hash, all that stuff but I couldn’t stop alcohol, so I thought, "Well, this is my medicine." People pick their poison. Thank God I didn’t pick heroin otherwise I’d probably be dead and I was almost dead from alcohol. It’s all the same. From beer to crystal meth, it’s all the same. It’s a drug.

Alcoholism is a disease. Your brain wants that drug and when we have it that drugged up brain wants more and more and that’s a disease which has no cure and wants to kill you and if you don’t work at it every day you’ll relapse. If I relapse I’ll probably die not that I plan on doing that.

FOX411: How many times were you in rehab?
O’Brien: Four. First one was a joke because I was trying to get away from the scandal. The second one was a relapse-- I didn’t take it seriously. Third one was I relapsed two days after I got out of the second one and then it really kicked in. It was after Heath Ledger died who I’d sat in recovery meetings with and it just really kind of hit me.

I used alcohol as medicine. I thought it crept up on me but now that I look back on it, it was there all along. I was a functioning alcoholic till I was about 55 and then at the very end it was just impossible and I couldn’t hide it and everybody knew.

FOX411: You were found passed out after falling down. It’s a miracle you’re still alive.
O’Brien: It’s amazing. Obviously there is a God. I have an angel looking over me. More obviously that I got help in time. I finally listened and I finally realized as we learn in recovery, there is a solution that is real. That I have a problem that is not just alcohol, it’s alcoholism and the big part of the problem is the ism. The resentments and fear and anxiety and "I want this," and "I want more money." All this stuff has to be taken care of day by day. That’s what everyone should try to do. But you try to keep your head clear everyday of all that crap.

FOX411: Do you worry about relapsing? Philip Seymour Hoffman had been clean for 20 years. 
O’Brien: A relapse is a death sentence when you’re that far along. People say the program doesn’t work. The program works but what doesn’t work is your brain. Your brain is always saying to you, "Have that drink." My mantra has been, you can get help but you have to want it. Whitney Houston, I don’t think she really wanted it.

FOX411: How is your life now?
O’Brien: My life is great. I’m sober. I try to go to two recovery meetings every day. I go to at least five to seven a week. I wake up every morning and say, "Help me," and I go to bed every night and say, "Thank you." I’m very close with my son. I’m honest with myself. I don’t have the desire to be "Pat O’Brien" anymore although I still have all that grandiosity. I’ll work on that.