Colin Farrell got sober for special needs son, was in ‘no condition’ to be father

From his partying ways to his public flings, Colin Farrell was once known as Hollywood's bad boy. Now, the 48-year-old Irish actor is living life as a devoted dad of two and credits his elder son, James — who has a rare neurogenic disorder called Angelman syndrome — for his sobriety of nearly twenty years. 

At the height of his career, the Golden Globe Award winner had fame, wealth, high-profile relationships and more. The actor was rumored to have had romances with stars including Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Angelina Jolie and Rihanna. 

But behind that public persona, Farrell was struggling. 

"I had suspicions, before I got sober, of how painful life could be," Farrell told Jamie Lee Curtis during a paired interview with Variety in 2022. "But I had no ability to hold that without being self-destructive and without living in it."

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For years, Farrell found himself tangled up in the downward spiral of addiction. 

"The amount of energy you have to put in and the amount of lies you have to tell to keep a drug habit alive, it’s fairly significant. Your whole life is a lie," Farrell told Details Magazine in 2012, per Destination hope Treatment Center. 

It wasn't until the birth of his son James, who was diagnosed with a rare neurogenic disorder called Angelman syndrome at age two, that his perspective started to slowly change. 

"Everything’s magnified when you have a child with special needs," he recently told People magazine "You’re even more aware that your child needs you around and going to need a lot of help and support."

"James was two when I got clean and sober," Farrell, who entered a treatment facility for drugs and alcohol in 2006, continued. "He was a big part of me putting the bottle down. I was in no condition to be a friend, never mind a father of a child with such exacting needs. If it wasn’t for my sobriety, I wouldn’t be able to be there for James and enjoy in the marvels of his life and support him in the way that I feel that I can."

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"I don't want to paint the picture that I'm the perfect dad," he added. "I f--- up left, right and center. But, at least, you have to be present to f--- up. So it's neck and neck. They're obviously conjoined, my sobriety and the two children that I have. James and Henry (14, whom he shares with ‘Ondine’ costar Alicja Bachleda-Curús) are … the aspect of my life, the presences within my life that I'm most grateful for."

In 2021, Farrell spoke candidly about how his sobriety has impacted his professional career as well. 

"After 15 or 20 years of carousing the way I caroused and drinking the way I drank, the sober world is a pretty scary world," Farrell said during a virtual event at the Virgin Media Dublin International Film Festival, according to The Irish Times. 

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"To come home and not to have the buffer support of a few drinks just to calm the nerves, it was a really amazing thing," he continued. "And I remember being more nervous, and being more uncomfortable initially at the film festival than any others, because I didn’t have any booze."

"Having gotten through the initial discomfort and self-judgments and whatever tensions were created inside me, it was easily the most rewarding film festival that I’d had. And it was the one I could remember the most."

"The amount of energy you have to put in and the amount of lies you have to tell to keep a drug habit alive, it’s fairly significant. Your whole life is a lie."

— Colin Farrell

While Farrell has been open about his sobriety, he's kept his life at home extremely private — until now. 

In a new interview with People, Farrell shared some of the rawest moments he's experienced as a dad caring for a son with special needs, and explained why he's chosen to launch a foundation to help families in similar situations. 

"I'm very private. I've never had crews within our home. It's a very safe space," Farrell told the outlet. "I have to, or choose to believe, that if James knew that doing this could help families and other young adults who live with special needs, he would say, ‘Dad, what are you talking about? Why are you even asking me? It’s a no-brainer.'"

Farrell detailed his older son's early childhood years and revealed the moments leading up to the crushing diagnosis. 

"I thought he was just a chill baby, but then he just wasn't hitting benchmarks," said Farrell, who shares James with model Kim Bordenave. "He wasn't sitting up, crawling. . . . We knew something was up developmental, delays."

James was diagnosed with Angelman syndrome around age two, said Farrell. Angelman syndrome is a condition caused by a change in a gene, called a genetic change, according to the Mayo Clinic. It causes delayed development, problems with speech and balance, mental disability and, sometimes, seizures.

While adjusting to the news, Farrell said he was greeted with some of life's most "profound" moments — moments he was able to enjoy in his sobriety. 

"I’ll never forget James’ first steps,' he recalled. "Two weeks short of his fourth birthday. We were in the house we lived in at the time, and Deborah (a member of James' care team) came upstairs and said, ‘James has something to show you.’

"She said go over there. She let him go," Farrell said, while fighting back tears. "It was so profound. It was magic. I'll never forget the face of determination as he just walked towards me. I burst into tears. It was amazing.

"To be told that he may never walk, and see those first steps, I’ll just never forget it. It was so overwhelmingly beautiful." 

In honor of James, Farrell recently launched the Colin Farrell Foundation, an effort to create a support system for families with kids who have special needs. 

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"For years, [I've] wanted to do something in the realm of providing greater opportunities for families who have a child with special needs, to receive the support that they deserve, basically the assistance in all areas of life," he told the outlet.

"This is the first time I’ve spoken about it, and obviously the only reason I’m speaking is I can’t ask James if he wants to do this."

"I mean, I can. I speak to James as if he’s 20 and has perfect fluency with the English language and age-appropriate cognitive ability," he added. "But I can’t discern a particular answer from him as to whether he’s comfortable with all this or not. So, I have to make a call based on knowing James’ spirit and what kind of young man he is and the goodness that he has in his heart."

While Farell said he often struggles with the idea of not being able to be there to protect his son down the line, he hopes he can create a space for him where he can feel like he belongs. 

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"James' last 20, 30, 40 last years of his life, he'll be somewhere where he feels like he belongs, where he feels like he's safe, where he can garden, watch movies, swim in the pool and go out to the beach and just have a full and meaningful and connected life," he said. "That would be the dream."