Most People Don't Want to See Two Guys Get It On

I've been getting no small amount of grief about the fact that I've been making fun of "Brokeback Mountain," the gay cowboy movie.

I've been making fun of it because it seems to me to be a movie in defiance of its audience. I don't think this is going to be a box office hit. It will make no money, at least in Hollywood terms.

I'm sure it will be a critical hit. Hollywood may in fact want to give every Oscar it can find to the first gay cowboy movie.

But I just think most people do not want to go into a darkened room with a tub of popcorn and munch away watching two guys get it on.

I just don't.

I had one prominent writer say he wouldn't come on my radio show because I made hate encouraging speech when I said I couldn't figure out which was going to be harder to watch: the guys smooching in "Brokeback" or Bob Baer getting his fingernails ripped out in "Syriana."

I said, "Hey, I know people who are gay and I have nothing against them, but I don't want to see this movie."

So who rides to my rescue? Noted Hollywood liberal and cranky comedian Larry David, the star of "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and the mad genius behind the "Seinfeld" show.

Larry David is widely credited with the famous "Seinfeld" line about gayness: "... not that there's anything wrong with it ..."

So Larry David writes in The New York Times on New Year's Day:

"I haven't seen 'Brokeback Mountain' nor do I have any intention of seeing it. In fact, cowboys would have to lasso me, drag me into the theater and tie me to the seat and even then I would make every effort to close my eyes and cover my ears."

Larry David goes on to make the point that maybe seeing the movie would be a little too attractive to him and he doesn't want to be attracted to gay cowboys.

Larry David is a funny guy. He makes the point he's completely pro-gay. For instance, he's for gay marriage. I, on the other hand, am highly suspicious of gay nuptials. However, this is a country that considers straight marriages performed by skydiving Elvises to be legal and on the up and up, so go figure.

But back to the movie. I still think it's a gay agenda movie and as such it might sweep the Oscars. I just have my doubts about whether America will make it an actual box office hit.

That's My Word.

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